Post box in Townparks, County Meath (14011023)

Explorer Tom Our Lady's Hospital in Townparks was a workhouse that now gets to play dress-up as a hospital, which is a bit of a stretch. It would tell its replacement that it at least had character and some really nice gabled end bays. Look for the ghost, then pretend you didn't.

Explorer Tom Hospital or infirmary in Townparks handles nosey neighbours by pretending to be asleep, which works surprisingly well given its current job as ambulance control. It’s got that round-headed door that looks like a surprised owl, just waiting for someone to knock. Take a breath of that air, it's older than your car.

Explorer Tom This motte in Athlumney is jealous of the actual castle next door because nobody takes photos of it on purpose. It’s just a big dirt cone that dreams of having a roof one day. Stand on the spot and imagine the gossip it's heard from the river.

Explorer Tom Liscartan Castle smells like old money and regret, according to Tom, which is basically the scent profile of every tower house in County Meath. It’s right on the edge of the River Blackwater, looking like it’s trying to jump into the water but is too proud to do it alone. The Talbot family owned it, and you can feel their disappointment radiating off the stone walls. Walk past slowly like you're

Explorer Tom Donaghmore Round Tower in County Meath is probably the favourite hangout for local rabbits who use it as their main lookout point for danger. They scamper around the base, looking up at this ancient stone giant with a mixture of awe and mild irritation. It’s basically their personal tower of power without them knowing it. Snap one photo, then put the phone away and actually look.

Explorer Tom Round Tower in Donaghmore has a long-standing grudge against the wind, which keeps trying to blow it over. It’s survived centuries, so let the clouds have their moment. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did.

Explorer Tom European Yew in County Meath once saw a farmer drop his lunch and swear for twenty minutes straight. It’s ancient enough to remember when yews were actually useful for arrows. Get a photo with it before it gets a better agent.

Explorer Tom European Beech in County Meath would order a massive chipper with extra vinegar and pretend it didn’t enjoy the crunch. It’s got a very posh attitude for something growing in mud. Snap one photo, then put the phone away and actually look.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Meadstown would tell a teenager that the 1800s were just a long period where everyone died quietly and no one complained about it, except on headstones. The walls weren't there originally. Have a chat with it, nobody's watching.

Explorer Tom Hill of Tara in County Meath is doing its best to look ancient while secretly wondering if anyone still remembers it. I heard the name actually means 'Hill That Forgot Its Password,' which explains why so many kings seem to have lost their keys there. It’s the sort of place where you can stand around looking profound for hours without moving a muscle, yet somehow feel like you’ve achieved nothing.

Explorer Tom Saint Patrick's in County Meath has strict rules for visitors, mostly about not tripping over your own feet. It’s a bit shy about being famous for that one statue. Get there early and have it all to yourself before the crowds arrive. The grass is suspiciously green, probably from all the attention.

Explorer Tom Lia Fáil: Hill of Tara is a stone with high standards. Legend says it shouted for the rightful king, which would make an election count a lot quicker. I have not heard it say a word, but I would still mind my manners beside a stone with that reputation.