Post box in Ballyegan

Explorer Tom Ballyeighan gate lodge looks like a Hansel-and-Gretel affair that got lost on the way to being classy. It’s Tudor Revival with rustic dressings that just scream “try hard” from across the road. I bet there’s a biscuit tin buried in the garden that’s actually treasure. Count t

Explorer Tom Lisduff Cottage in Lisduff is a small vernacular house that’s surviving against the odds of big houses everywhere else. It’s got a timber panelled door with a mouthorgan overlight, which sounds like a musical instrument but isn’t. The local materials make it feel grounded, unlike those posh stone manors that act superior. It’s charming because it’s small and doesn’t try to be anything else.

Explorer Tom Black Bull in Rath Beg is telling teenagers that the 1800s were basically just everyone wearing wigs and complaining about the weather. It was a pub and police station, which sounds like a recipe for chaos. Go at sunset to catch the last light hitting its cheeky old windows.

Explorer Tom Birr Barracks in Crinkill smells like old stone and regret, according to my very scientific nose. It’s just walls now, but they’re loud about guarding the Shannon crossing. Spot the oldest stone and give it a nod.

Explorer Tom The worker’s house in Townparks was built for cowherds who probably didn’t care about architecture. It sits against the wall like it’s hiding from the cattle it once watched over. Ten minutes here and you’ll smell the imaginary milk, promise.

Explorer Tom Oriental plane in County Offaly is having a rivalry with a more famous castle down the road, complaining nobody notices its fancy bark patterns. It’s very dramatic about its lack of fame. A good place to forget your phone for ten minutes.

Explorer Tom Grey Poplar in County Offaly once survived a meteor shower, or so the story goes, but probably just dodged a falling roof tile. It acts like it saw a ghost. Bring your own legend, I've run out.

Explorer Tom Birr Heritage Centre in County Offaly thinks tourists from Dublin are all talk and no history. It’s seen enough people claim to know everything about the local stars without reading a single plaque. It waits patiently for them to realize they missed the point entirely. Bring someone who'll believe anything.

Explorer Tom Emmet Square once saw a pigeon land on the monument and everyone thought it was a sign from God. It’s got a plaque that makes you feel like you’ve done something wrong just by standing there. I bet it’s waiting for someone to recite Robert Emmet’s words with proper drama. Have a nosey, politely.

Explorer Tom Killaleigh Castle would bring a Z-plan diagram and a stiff upper lip to any party. It’s four storeys high but feels like it’s waiting for someone to pay rent. Bring a jacket, it's never as warm as I promise.

Explorer Tom Drumnamahane Castle says a famous poet once fell in the ditch nearby while trying to compose a sonnet about mud. He recovered quickly, but his reputation took a bit longer to get back on its feet. Bring the dog, it'll have opinions.

Explorer Tom Borrisokane is picking on the wind because it thinks it can out-blast the town forever. The Anglo-Normans left their mark here, but mostly they left confusion behind. Ideal place to rehearse an excuse for being late.