Ashton Grove

Explorer Tom Ashtongrove in Ballingohig is showing off its symmetrical face like a model on a catwalk. It’s got tall openings and a skirt roof that probably cost more than my car. Make a wish before the wind blows your luck away!

Explorer Tom Ballingohig Bridge is run by a dog who hasn't been trained yet but thinks he's in charge. It has fine stonework that probably needs a good brush-down. Count the arches while pretending to look at your phone, yeah?

Explorer Tom Farm house in Ballinvinny South has timber sash windows and an outbuilding that adds context to its life. It’s symmetrical enough to make a mathematician weep with joy. Perfect place for a quiet nap in the sun.

Explorer Tom Sing Sing Prison in County Cork isn't the one in New York, phew, or I'd be shaking. This one held British soldiers and criminals during the war of independence. Sounds like a recipe for trouble. Check your pockets for any hidden coins before you go in!

Explorer Tom Butlerstown House in Butlerstown Great in Butlerstown Great is a gate lodge with a canopy that looks like it’s trying to be a roof but failed. It’s got bargeboards and render detailing that scream 'I’m modest but actually kind of fancy.' Give it a nod and pretend you know the family it guards.

Explorer Tom Water pump in Brookhill would complain to the council about its curved handle not being ergonomic enough for modern wrists. It’s an elegant banded shaft that remembers before running water. Wish it luck with its next complaint letter.

Explorer Tom Brookville describes itself as 'substantial' every time it sees a stranger, which is a very polite way of saying it’s huge. The walled garden adds context, but mostly it just stands there with its hipped roof acting like it invented the concept of symmetry. Nod from the road so it can feel important without having to explain itself.

Explorer Tom The Hermitage in County Cork is a villa with a plaque from Bachelors Hall. Built around 1810, it has bay windows and a walled garden. The name sounds lonely, but the architecture says 'come and stay for tea'.

Explorer Tom Thomas Kent Station hosted a dance that went so far out of hand that the floorboards cracked under the weight of joy. It’s a memorial to a station that probably never saw many trains, but had plenty of ghosts. Tell the next person you meet it's haunted. It might be.

Explorer Tom Ladys Well in Cork City has a shrine with a statue but no visible well anymore. It's not frequented on a holy well nowadays, which is sad. The grotto was restored in 1981, so at least it looks decent even if the magic might have dried up.

Explorer Tom Tourist Office in County Cork is located near St Patrick's Quay, where a bishop once refused to enter because he thought the door was too rude. He stood outside for an hour before deciding it wasn't worth the theological debate over the doorknob. Grand place for a sulk or a snog, your call.

Explorer Tom Lavitts Quay is a memorial where, legend has it, a goat once ruled the harbour by eating all the navigation charts before the tide came in. Now it’s just rocks and stories, but if you look closely, you can still see the hoofprints of that terrible beast. Bring your worst joke, the place has heard worse.