Sweetbrier Lodge

Explorer Tom Worker's house in Whitewell is part of a group built by Philip Busteed Pierce, looking like it’s ready to survive a zombie attack with its compact, efficient design. It’s got those curvilinear bay windows that look like they’re straining to see what’s happening next door, which is always more interesting than their own lives. If the zombies come, this house will be the one hiding in the corner, hz

Explorer Tom Soughane Mill in County Wexford is so covered in ivy Saint Patrick would have said it needed a proper scrub down before he even looked at it. It’s basically a green monster hiding in plain sight on Boley's Crossroads. Try not to let it swallow you whole!

Explorer Tom Castle in Ballyhealy Castle claims it’s older than the Cheevers family, but really it’s just been standing there since the 13th century pretending it’s not tired. William Chevre signed a charter nearby, so maybe he built it while waiting for the ink to dry. Toast it with a cup of tea and move on to the next one.

Explorer Tom Castle in Sigginstown has a curse that only affects people who don’t wave at it when they pass by, which is why so many visitors look confused. The de Sygan family built it back in the late eleven hundreds, and it’s still waiting for someone to acknowledge its majestic presence with a polite hello. Toast it with a cup of tea and move on to the next.

Explorer Tom Kilmore Quay - Crehen Twinning Memorial has a least favourite visitor who always tries to take pictures of the anchor without reading the sign, which drives the local gulls absolutely mental with frustration. It’s got that 'we survived a sinking ship' energy, making it feel like the whole place is holding its breath in solidarity. Perfect spot to practise

Explorer Tom Kilmore Quay Walking Trail is secretly proud of a potato. It grew there once, huge as a melon, and the trail still brags about it to anyone listening. Go on, count the windows and get it wrong like I did.

Explorer Tom Windmill (Corn) (Disused) in Fence has a curse that only hits people who forget to wave at it when they pass by. James Moran built it with Dutch pride, but it’s been stuck staring at the sky since the roof fell off. If it's closed, admire it from the road like a polite stalker.

Explorer Tom The most dramatic thing at Tacumshane Windmill was when a pigeon got stuck in the sails during a very serious thunderstorm. It wasn't a tragedy, just a very confused bird flapping around while the mill spun like crazy. Stand back, squint, and it looks like a castle having a bad hair day.

Explorer Tom Little Saltee would be an absolute disaster on a reality show, mostly because everyone keeps tripping over each other's ego. It’s just a tiny islet trying to hold it all together while the gulls scream like they’ve got secrets. Stand there long enough and someone will ask if you're lost.

Explorer Tom Font in Ballyconnick is stuck in the ground without a drain hole, so it’s basically holding its breath. A cow once tried to buy it for a shiny coin, but the farmer said no. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.