Liam de Róiste

Explorer Tom Fountainstown House in Fountainstown has been sitting pretty since the seventeenth century, looking down on us moderns with that calm, wealthy stare. If it went to a chipper today, I bet it would order three portions of chips without breaking a sweat. Say hello to the Hodder legacy while you’re passing by!

Explorer Tom Ringabella House is writing on its dating profile: ‘Classically inspired coastal beauty with an irregular façade and quirky charm’. It’s got timber sliding sash windows and a segmental-headed doorcase that add to its traditional character without being boring. The related outbuildings complete the setting, so just admire from a distance and let it know you’re interested but not too eager.

Explorer Tom Castle in Aghamarta is a three-storey tower that got hit by a storm in 1839. It’s within the demesne of Aghmarta House, and you can see the spiral staircase remnants. It’s got a round-arched door too. Look for the vault!

Explorer Tom Myrtleville Beach is the sort of Cork shore where I might promise a heroic swim and then announce that my ankles have already done enough. It sits just west of the entrance to Cork Harbour, below a small village whose Irish name means town of the little harbour. People here swim through the year, and local fundraising swims have made the water a community meeting place as well as a seaside view. The village has grown carefully around its older shore. Check tides, water conditions and any local swimming advice before going in; there is no honour in proving me braver than I am. Stay on public beach access and respect homes above it. Look out towards the harbour traffic. The beach makes the busy sea feel briefly like a neighbour.

Explorer Tom Burnt mound in Kilnahera West: Saint Patrick would probably say this is what happens when you don’t check the fire before leaving for lunch. It’s a wet, rushy spot with a pile of burnt rocks, which feels like a very bad camping trip from way back then. A handy spot to stretch your legs and your imagination.

Explorer Tom Church Bay Beach has strong opinions about the road that leads to it, mostly that it’s too bumpy for its taste. The bay is tucked away so well that you have to work for it, which makes the view feel like a reward. It’s quiet enough to hear your own heartbeat, provided you don’t mind the gulls heckling you. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will check.

Explorer Tom Curraghbinny Woods bragged about surviving a storm that flattened everything else within a mile radius. It acts like it was just a gentle breeze to show off its resilience. Bring a coin for luck and keep it in your pocket.

Explorer Tom Carrigaline Castle in Carrigaline East is hiding behind a lot of ivy and quarried stone. Only half the tower is really standing, but it looks mysterious. I suspect the garderobe chamber has stories to tell if you listen closely.

Explorer Tom Camden Fort is sitting up there judging your outfit and probably writing a scathing review of your life choices on its little notepad. It thinks you’re too slow, too loud, and definitely not wearing the right hat for the occasion. Bring a coin for luck and keep it in your pocket.