Castle in Clonmines

Explorer Tom Bawn in Clonmines would tell your interview that its resume is basically just 'survived the weather' and 'held things together'. It’s humble, sturdy, and slightly confused about its own job description. A handy spot to stretch your legs and your imagination.

Explorer Tom Black Castle is hiding something under its cellar floor that even the archaeologists are too scared to dig up. Probably just a very angry cat from 1500. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom Mausoleum in Ballylannan looks like a fancy tombstone that got tired of being flat and decided to stand up. Francis Robert Leigh built it, which sounds like a name from a Victorian soap opera gone wrong. Bring a hat if you’re going to stare at it for too long because the sun is out.

Explorer Tom Ballylannan graveyard smells like wet wool and regret, according to Tom’s very sensitive nose that detects old sorrow from miles away. The wind carries a scent of damp earth and forgotten secrets that makes your socks itch inside your shoes. Breathe in the nostalgia, but not too deep!

Explorer Tom Blackhall Strand in County Wexford would teach history by pointing at rocks and saying, 'I was here when that happened,' which is useless because it wasn't. It’s got a natural arch that looks like a giant sneeze. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.

Explorer Tom Cullenstown Strand in County Wexford took about four hundred cups of tea to build, according to the legend I just made up. The River Muck flows into it like a lazy cat finding its spot. Go back in winter, it's a different animal.

Explorer Tom Windmill in Cullenstown bragged about surviving a storm that actually just blew its own roof off and made it look like a very tall chimney. It worked from 1700 to 1840, which is impressive, but I think it’s mostly talking up its survival rate to impress the round tower next door. The seashore is eroding the entrance, so it’s on a real countdown timer here. Perfect place to be dramatically windswe.

Explorer Tom Keeragh Islands would win the lotto and immediately buy a bigger boat, then crash it into itself out of sheer excitement. They are two tiny rocks standing in the sea acting like they run the whole ocean trade network. If it's closed, admire it from the road like a polite stalker.

Explorer Tom Hook Head Adventures features a bird that refuses to leave no matter how many people try to shoo it away politely. It sits right there, judging everyone who comes down to see the cliff edge, acting like it owns the whole coastline personally now. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will check.

Explorer Tom Hook Tourism (Fethard Office) is where the rabbits go to complain about the tourists who keep stepping on their patches. It’s an eco-adventure company that thinks it’s serious but looks a bit ridiculous in photos. The office probably smells like wet wool and ambition. Best enjoyed with a bag of chips and no plans for tomorrow.

Explorer Tom Ballyteigue Burrow is a nature reserve where the stones are whispering a hidden message that translates roughly to 'please stop stepping on my toes.' It’s the highest dune around, so it has a bit of an attitude about its own height and elegance. Dare you to say hello to it out loud.