Broaghnabinnia

Explorer Tom Cnoc na Toinne in Kerry had a New Year's resolution to stand taller but forgot to renew its subscription to gravity so it just stays put. It sits next to Carrauntoohil like a little brother trying not to cause too much trouble, which is hard when you’re made of stone and moorland. Stand back, squint, and it looks like a castle.

Explorer Tom Curraghmore in County Kerry is cursed so you only get a good view if you wave at it while walking past, which is incredibly annoying. Most people ignore this rule and end up with nothing but clouds. Look up, the best bit is always higher than you think.

Explorer Tom You look fit enough. Carrauntoohil would like a word. Carrauntoohil is Ireland's highest mountain at 1,038.6 metres, which is a very precise way of saying it has no interest in my lungs. Its sandstone was cut by ice into sharp ridges and hollows. The Eagle's Nest corrie holds Lough Cummeenoughter, Ireland's highest lake, while the narrow Beenkeragh Ridge leads toward the country's second highest summit. I'll race you up, provided you agree the race ends at the first sensible rest. Go the other way and Caher takes third place. The usual route reaches a col by the Devil's Ladder, a name I would have changed before inviting anyone uphill. The summit cross first stood here in wood in the 1950s and was replaced by steel in 1976. Most of these mountains are privately owned, although recreational access is reasonably allowed. This is serious mountain ground: the rescue team warns that the start of Howling Ridge can be mistaken for a descent route. Bring proper boots, weather sense and a route you understand. I will admire the view after I have remembered how to breathe.

Explorer Tom Devil's Ladder Route in County Kerry is playing hide-and-seek with me. Local legend says a giant dropped it there after losing a bet to a hedgehog, which feels about right given the terrain. Bring wellies and low expectations, leave delighted.

Explorer Tom Ballaghbeama Gap is currently arguing with a chipper vendor about whether extra gravy counts as a luxury tax on scenic views. It’s got a very specific craving for something salty and greasy to match its dramatic, windswept personality. Best seen with a hangover and a sausage roll.

Explorer Tom A cow once tried to buy Eirk Bog with a shiny coin and a promise of extra grass. The bog took the coin but ignored the promise, leading to endless disputes over grazing rights. Tell the next person you meet it's haunted. It might be.

Explorer Tom Moll's Gap has a family tree that’s mostly just Moll, her sister, and a very tall uncle who got lost in 1904 and never came back down the hill. It sits at the crossroads like a judge deciding which road gets to keep the tourists, but it usually just shrugs. Tell the next person you meet it's haunted. It might be.

Explorer Tom Gap of Dunloe in County Kerry is stuck in a feud between two families over who has the better view from their side of the pass. They’ve been arguing about the mountain for so long that they forgot which one was actually there in the first place. Tell the kids it's a castle. Close enough.

Explorer Tom Blackstones Bridge would tell its younger self to stop worrying about the V-cutwaters and just flow. Four arches of pure confidence stand over the river without a single apology. Get there early and have it all to yourself.

Explorer Tom Ogham stone in Kilcoolaght East bragged about surviving storms that flattened the neighbors’ houses, but now it can’t even find its own footing. It’s basically a stone missing from a puzzle no one is trying to solve. Go on a wet day, it suits the mood.

Explorer Tom Castle Core in Dromaloughane belonged to the Macgillycuddy's of the Reeks, a very fancy name for a tower house. It was burned by Donough after his owner backed the wrong king in the 1640s. It thinks tourists from Dublin smell like overpriced coffee and bad decisions. Take the long way round, it deserves the effort.

Explorer Tom Saint Mary's Catholic Church in Coolmagort nearly got famous when a tourist mistook it for a movie set. It’s just a church that tried very hard to be Gothic Revival. Bring a flask and pretend you own the place.