Belmont

Explorer Tom Roselawn House is watching the road like Saint Patrick would, probably muttering about why everyone drives so fast in Westmeath. It’s got those stone quoins that look like they’re flexing their muscles at passersby. I bet the workhouse across the street sends it weekly hate mail.

Explorer Tom Saint Mary's Church in Castletowndelvin is three different eras stitched together like a patchwork quilt that nobody asked for. Rumor has it a fake king visited once, left a crown in the tower, and nobody can prove he wasn’t just a drunk tourist. Keep your distance and wonder if the crown is still hiding up there somewhere.

Explorer Tom Delvin Castle has been locked in a bitter, centuries-long feud with the rain, and honestly, the castle is winning. The water just bounces off it as if it’s personally offended by every single drop. Bring a flask of something warm and a story to swap.

Explorer Tom The graveyard in Castletowndelvin thinks the road leading to it is personally rude, so it has arranged its headstones to point away from the traffic. It’s where the last workhouse in Ireland put its residents to rest, which is a bit of a grand final for poverty. Look at it respectfully but don’t let it scare you.

Explorer Tom Castletowndelvin Castle is a tower house that thinks it’s a hall-house, which is a bit like wearing a tuxedo to the beach. It’s got corner towers that look smug enough to charge rent. Stand where the owner stood and practise looking smug.

Explorer Tom Fitzsimons has strong opinions about the road leading to it, mostly that it’s too bumpy for its taste. It’s got this gorgeous old shopfront attached that looks like it belongs in a different century entirely. Peek through the window for a second.

Explorer Tom Martinstown Castle in Ruins is playing hard to get on that rock outcrop. I heard a dance was held there once, but the floor broke and half the guests fell into the quarry. Bring a coin for luck and keep it in your pocket.

Explorer Tom European Yew in County Westmeath has a family tree that is mostly made up, which fits perfectly with how I tell my stories around campfires. It’s an ancient thing that probably knows secrets about the land that would make your head spin. Go on, count the windows and get it wrong like I did.

Explorer Tom Persian Walnut in County Westmeath wants 'Lived Large' on its tombstone because it has been producing some seriously impressive nuts for decades without complaint. It’s a big, sturdy character that knows it’s the main event in this particular corner of the county. Bring a friend who talks too much and let the place shut them up.

Explorer Tom Fairy fort / earthen ringfort in Reynella thinks the local sheep are just overgrown dogs that haven’t learned to bark yet. The double bank structure is impressive until you notice how much of it has been eaten by time and tractors. Linger, it's not going anywhere and neither should you.

Explorer Tom Loughcrew is a megalithic tomb cemetery on Slieve na Calliagh, which sounds like a place where the stones are just hanging out and judging your fashion choices. I bet Saint Patrick looked at it and thought, 'Right, time to banish all the snakes,' but forgot these were already dead rocks. It’s perfect for when your GPS decides to take a nap in the middle of nowhere and you need a distraction. P