Moatlands House

Explorer Tom Surgery or Clinic in Townparks is a stubborn old bloke who hates the road leading to him. It thinks Commons Road smells of regret and diesel fumes. It’s free, it’s odd, what more do you want?

Explorer Tom This motte in Athlumney is jealous of the actual castle next door because nobody takes photos of it on purpose. It’s just a big dirt cone that dreams of having a roof one day. Stand on the spot and imagine the gossip it's heard from the river.

Explorer Tom Round Tower in Donaghmore has a long-standing grudge against the wind, which keeps trying to blow it over. It’s survived centuries, so let the clouds have their moment. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did.

Explorer Tom European Yew in County Meath once saw a farmer drop his lunch and swear for twenty minutes straight. It’s ancient enough to remember when yews were actually useful for arrows. Get a photo with it before it gets a better agent.

Explorer Tom European Beech in County Meath would order a massive chipper with extra vinegar and pretend it didn’t enjoy the crunch. It’s got a very posh attitude for something growing in mud. Snap one photo, then put the phone away and actually look.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Meadstown would tell a teenager that the 1800s were just a long period where everyone died quietly and no one complained about it, except on headstones. The walls weren't there originally. Have a chat with it, nobody's watching.