Killinane Graveyard

Explorer Tom Ardfort House has a secret celebrity friend who is actually a very posh goose that lives out back. It tries to look elegant with its sash windows but you can see the farmyard chaos leaking through. Wave at the goose, it knows exactly what it’s doing and owns the place.

Explorer Tom Glengarriff House gates in Glengarriff would definitely buy a golden scooter and park it right in the middle of the lane if they won the lotto. They’re just standing there looking fancy, pretending they don't want any attention at all from passersby. Wave hello, but keep your hands where I can see them!

Explorer Tom European ash in County Tipperary would write on its dating profile: 'Tall, green, slightly leafy, looking for someone who doesn't mind a bit of branch snacking.' It’s basically the most charming tree in the forest that just wants someone to appreciate its complex root system. Go in good boots and better humour.

Explorer Tom Black Castle would tell a stranger it's just 'a bit of a dark mood' rather than being an actual fortress. It’s got that vibe where you wonder if it’s brooding or just tired. It's the kind of place that makes a dull Tuesday interesting without even trying hard.

Explorer Tom Ballynahow Castle has made its New Year's resolution to finally fix that mural stairway so it doesn’t look like a ladder built by a drunk carpenter. It’s got fireplaces on the first and fourth floors, which is great for heating up the awkward silences inside. Bring a jacket, it's never as warm as I promise.

Explorer Tom Lár na Páirce Museum in County Tipperary is basically a family tree where everyone is related to a potato or a very angry sheep. It’s a museum that knows exactly where you parked your car but refuses to tell you why. Best enjoyed with a bag of chips and no plans.