Jon-Hermann Hegg

Explorer Tom Eaglais Naomh Muire in Dingle bragged about surviving a storm that broke the pyramidal roof over the crossing. Built between 1862 and 1865, it’s got lean-to aisles that look like they’re leaning on each other for support. The bowed apse suggests it’s been through some emotional turmoil. Bring curiosity, leave with a better story than mine.

Explorer Tom Presentation Convent in Farrannakilla would post a selfie of its T-shaped plan and caption it 'complex.' It’s been standing since 1880, so it has plenty of patience. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom Fungie the Dolphin is probably laughing at you because it knows exactly which ditch the poet fell into back in the day. The statue’s got a smug little grin that says 'you’re next, love.' Bring a notebook and write the bit I made up.

Explorer Tom Charles Haughey in County Kerry was built by Dingle fishermen who clearly thought he’d never stop talking about fishing harbours. Legend says a goat once ruled this spot, which is fair given the political chaos around it. Stand where the owner stood and practise looking smug.

Explorer Tom You came for the harbour and found an emperor's business on the side. Dingle is not just a harbour with good manners and a famous dolphin story. In the thirteenth century its port exported more goods than Limerick, and later its merchants brought in continental wine. In 1529 an Earl of Desmond and the ambassador of Emperor Charles V signed a treaty here. I can barely get two neighbours to agree where to park, and Dingle was dealing with an emperor. I'd have negotiated with Charles V myself, provided he paid for the wine. The town also sent pilgrims toward Santiago de Compostela, which makes the harbour feel like the start of several kinds of adventure. Its name became another voyage: after Irish only official signs caused debate, a 2006 local vote favoured the bilingual form by 1,005 of 1,086 returned ballots. Today the streets are free to wander, though the working harbour and old town plots deserve more attention than a hurried photo stop. Find the water, then turn around and let the town tell you how far it has travelled.

Explorer Tom Hussy’s Folly has the local sheep giving it low ratings because they think it’s a fancy barn that refuses to serve their oatmeal. It was built during the famine as a job scheme, which is a bit cheeky for a structure named after a woman with a bad reputation. Tell the kids it's a castle. Close enough.

Explorer Tom Ogham stone in Baile An Tsagairt sparked such a huge argument last century you could hear it from the harbour. Ten stones, one big headache for everyone. Stick around for the light changing, it's a show.

Explorer Tom Ballintaggart Ogham Stones have a solid escape plan involving running away to Scotland if anyone asks them to translate their ancient scratch marks properly. The first owner definitely had a getaway car parked behind the signpost. If it rains, blame me.

Explorer Tom Cnoc na Ceathrún in Kerry is where Saint Patrick probably went to hide after forgetting all the snakes he’d banished from the country. It’s a four-way meeting point where the wind gets confused and blows you backwards, which is hilarious if you’re not the one getting blown. Perfect place to be dramatically windswept.