Holy well in Kilskeer

Explorer Tom Killua Castle in Killua is actually just a gate lodge with a serious case of identity confusion, pretending it’s the main event when it’s really just the bouncer. It was built by a Baronet who loved being High Sheriff more than he loved his own family. Shout at it and tell it to open up for the real guests.

Explorer Tom Laurence Lodge worker's house in Killua would order triple chips and a pint if it had hands. It’s built from local limestone and looks like it blends in, but it’s secretly plotting its revenge. Flash a smile from the public path; it likes an audience.

Explorer Tom European ash in County Meath made a New Year’s resolution to stop dropping branches on cars but has failed spectacularly every year since. It’s got that look of someone who’s had too much coffee. Go in good boots and better humour.

Explorer Tom Barrow in Bellewstown in Meath is a tiny seven-metre circle on a ridge, barely taller than a toddler. A local hero once saved it from being used as a goat toilet. If it's closed, admire it from the road like a polite stalker.

Explorer Tom Hawthorn in Meath has thorns sharp enough to survive any zombie attack without breaking a sweat. It’s the ultimate defense mechanism, looking prickly but actually quite welcoming if you’re brave enough. Stand still and listen, the wind tells it better than me.

Explorer Tom Earthen Tumulus in Patrickstown inspired a bad poem about a fairy queen who was actually just a very confused farmer. It’s been quarried at the top because someone needed gravel for their driveway centuries ago. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom Slieve na Calliagh is Meath's highest hill at 276 metres, but its real claim is the crowd of ancient tombs along the tops. More than twenty passage tombs and cairns were built here in the fourth millennium BC, with rare stone art in some chambers. Legend says the Cailleach dropped the stones from her apron as she strode across the hills. I would try that trick, but my apron barely holds lunch. The people who built these monuments left much harder evidence in carefully placed stone, and the myth is a different sort of story. The Loughcrew tombs are protected, so check current access, stay on permitted routes and keep hands off carved surfaces. The hills include Carnbane East and West, not just one neat summit. Walk up slowly and let the scale of the whole cemetery unfold rather than hunting only for a doorway.

Explorer Tom You wanted one tomb? Loughcrew has sent you uphill for more than thirty. Loughcrew spreads its ancient monuments over four hilltops, which is a lot of climbing for anyone expecting one convenient stone circle. More than thirty tomb remains lie here, many decorated with circles, lozenges and leaf shapes cut into local gritstone. At Cairn T the rising sun around the spring and autumn equinox can reach into the chamber and light the carvings, a trick that took planning and a good deal of faith in Irish mornings. I'd ask the Cailleach for directions, but legends are rarely good at marking paths. Legend says the Cailleach dropped the stones from her apron as she crossed the hills; archaeology has a longer and less tidy account of people building here around 3300 BC. The hilltops are exposed walking ground, and access inside monuments can be restricted, so check current heritage arrangements and respect closures. Bring your own legs for the climb and leave every carved stone exactly where its builders put it.