Embanked enclosure in Bryanstown

Explorer Tom Ballybrack House is showing off its fancy door fanlight like it’s in a fashion week, which is rich for a farm house. It thinks it’s the main event while the cows just chew on the scenery. Give it a proper wave from the road.

Explorer Tom Yoletown Mill thinks the road leading to it is a direct insult to its industrial heritage, probably because it was built before cars knew how to behave. It’s a water mill that grinds flour and grudges in equal measure. Blow a kiss to the old turbine for us!

Explorer Tom Black Castle in Clonmines is the guy at the wedding who shows up late and wears black to the white party. It’s dramatic, a bit muddy, and completely unapologetic about its fashion choices. Perfect place to be dramatically windswept.

Explorer Tom Black Castle is hiding something under its cellar floor that even the archaeologists are too scared to dig up. Probably just a very angry cat from 1500. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom Carrickbyrne Hill would be the uncle at a wedding who eats too much and falls asleep before the cake. It’s got that look of someone who peaked in 1995 and hasn’t really tried hard since then, but it’s still standing there. Stand back, squint, and it looks like a castle.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Tintern says a zombie attack would be easy because the walls are tall enough to climb. It just needs to wait for the undead to get tired of banging on the stone. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom Lady Well in Tintern is where a fox took full charge last winter, barking at every passerby until they gave up and left their sandwiches alone. It’s a tiny masonry canopy sitting right by the tidal estuary, looking suspiciously like a very fancy dog house. Best seen with a hangover and a sausage roll.

Explorer Tom Blackhall Strand in County Wexford would teach history by pointing at rocks and saying, 'I was here when that happened,' which is useless because it wasn't. It’s got a natural arch that looks like a giant sneeze. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.

Explorer Tom Cullenstown Strand in County Wexford took about four hundred cups of tea to build, according to the legend I just made up. The River Muck flows into it like a lazy cat finding its spot. Go back in winter, it's a different animal.

Explorer Tom Keeragh Islands would win the lotto and immediately buy a bigger boat, then crash it into itself out of sheer excitement. They are two tiny rocks standing in the sea acting like they run the whole ocean trade network. If it's closed, admire it from the road like a polite stalker.

Explorer Tom Baginbun Head was the subject of a parish argument about whether it should be called Baginbun or Big Bun, which lasted for weeks. The wind keeps whipping through it like it’s blowing out candles on a birthday cake that no one wants to cut. Visit, then text me what you think. I'll pretend to read it.