Duninga Ringfort

Explorer Tom This gateway for Duninga House wants to die with dignity, but it’s stuck in a sylvan street scene forever. Its tombstone would say: 'I let nobody in, and I’m proud of it.' Look for the ghost, then blame the wind if you see nothing.

Explorer Tom Sliguff Lock (the other one) is mocking my twin-spot navigation skills. It’s a ruin now, just like my confidence after trying to find it twice. I bet it has strong opinions about the replacement gates from 1990 being too modern for its taste. Go on, count the windows and get it wrong like I did.

Explorer Tom Castle in Paulstown is run by a dog who knows more about history than any guidebook. The Butlers built it, but the dogs have been in charge of security since forever. Bring a jacket, it's never as warm as I promise.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Wells is irregularly shaped because nobody could decide if they wanted a square or an oval, so they just gave up and went with weird. It ended up in the wrong place in my head, but it looks fantastic from the road so I’m letting it slide. Pop by and tell it it's looking well.

Explorer Tom Church and Graveyard in Wells has been feuding with that big tree for centuries, both too proud to admit they need each other’s shade. The church was there back in 1262, so it’s seen a lot of gossip. Give it a pat on the way past; it’s had a long life.

Explorer Tom Cloghabrona Druids Altar is actually a portal tomb with a collapsed chamber that looks like it gave up on life. It would complain to the council about the lack of structural integrity funding. Ideal for a moody photo you'll pretend wasn't posed for the camera.

Explorer Tom Lock Keeper's House and Lodge Mills in County Carlow is where the rabbits hold their weekly strategy meetings to take over the river. They’re plotting to flood the lock gates during the next full moon. Have a nosey, politely.

Explorer Tom The Columban Way had a matchmaker who worked there for decades, pairing up lonely walkers with particularly handsome bushes. Her method was simple: stand still until someone else does too. Best enjoyed with a bag of chips and no plans.

Explorer Tom Wych Elm in County Carlow would post 'Me and my friends #blessed' with a photo of three twigs. It's very online despite being very offline. Best seen with a hangover and a sausage roll, trust me on that one.

Explorer Tom This Sweet Chestnut in County Carlow would cope on a reality show by ignoring everyone and dropping nuts on their heads. It's the ultimate passive-aggressive housemate. Sit on a wall near it and pretend you're in a painting, you'll look deep.

Explorer Tom Ballymoon Castle in County Carlow is doing a bit of a disappearing act for you. Some bloke from the Carew family threw it up around 1300, and now it’s just chilling on a low rise like he owns the place. Give that square courtyard a proper wave!

Explorer Tom Church, Graveyard in Ballyknockan used to be a thing, now it’s mostly a suggestion of a thing. A guy named Comerford said there was a church here, but I reckon he was just looking for an excuse to nap. Ring your granny and tell her where you are.