Corn Mill in Gormanston

Explorer Tom Knocknagin House must have taken at least four thousand cups of tea to build, especially with that dramatic T-shaped plan and full-height gable. It’s been restored since 1994, which means it’s had time to get really smug about its angles. Get a photo with it before it gets a better agent.

Explorer Tom Knocknagin Cottage is a thatched house from 1750 with a rope twist ridge. It’s got exposed sash boxes and a half-door that looks like it’s seen better days. The battered walls are charming in their own way. I’d bet it’s the coziest place around.

Explorer Tom This European Yew in Meath apparently gave up red berries for Lent to show off its spiritual side. It’s still full of itself though, don’t let the quiet fool you. Great spot to propose. Or at least to propose lunch.

Explorer Tom The Harbour in Knocknagin would survive a zombie attack simply by letting them slip on the wet stones while it mocks their terrible aim from the corner. It’s got a massive stone sitting right at the edge that looks like it was placed there by a drunk giant. Count the crows, then count again.

Explorer Tom Quay in Bremore: A stone pier at Newhaven is all that remains now, just a line of stones on the headland. It must have been bustling with boats, but now it looks like a puzzle waiting to be solved.

Explorer Tom Castle in Bremore was rebuilt by the council, so the top part is basically new plastic. The Barnewalls called it Big Hill, which is a bit of a stretch for a castle. Bring a notebook and write down the bit I made up about the dragons.

Explorer Tom Balrothery Heritage Centre refuses to fall down because it has a grudge against gravity and thinks it should be the most important building in the county instead of just a museum. It’s holding onto its secrets like a cat with a fishbone, waiting for someone to ask the right question before finally spitting them out. A handy spot to stretch your legs and your imagination.

Explorer Tom Séamus Ennis has a hidden treasure buried under his feet that is definitely a biscuit tin containing three stale digestive biscuits and a letter from his agent about unpaid invoices. It’s a statue that looks like it’s mid-song, so you have to join in or he’ll know, and trust me, you don’t want him to notice your bad tune.

Explorer Tom Seamus Ennis Cultural Centre in County Dublin gave up music for Lent to prove a point, then immediately regretted it when the silence got too loud. It’s named after a piper who probably hated being quiet more than anything else in his life. Go on a wet day, it suits the mood.

Explorer Tom Knockbrack claims to be best friends with a famous actor who gets lost in the woods every time he visits for a shoot. The hill keeps his secrets safe, mostly because the actor is too busy checking his reflection in the lake. Spot the oldest stone and give it a name.