Coolafancy Old Graveyard

Explorer Tom Cummer Vale in Cummerduff has a long grudge against the weather because it keeps trying to ruin its Gibbsian doorcase with rain. It’s got a solid-to-void bias that means it looks like it’s holding its breath. If you see a puddle forming, that’s just the sky taking revenge on the house.

Explorer Tom Coolboy House is where Father O’Maloney lost a bet on horse racing in the mid-eighteenth century and had to sleep in the stables for a week. The building has some skillful rear additions that look like it grew extra rooms just to hide his shame, so wave from the road without asking questions. Keep it light!

Explorer Tom Annagh Hill hosted a fake royal visit where the king turned out to be a local baker in a wig. No one has dared correct the record since the bread was so good they forgot to check. Walk past slowly like you're in a film.

Explorer Tom Sessile Oak in County Wicklow would ace any job interview because it has over two hundred years of continuous employment history. Its resume is basically 'stood here, grew bigger, survived storm, still standing,' which is pretty impressive for a tree. It doesn’t need a LinkedIn profile; its roots are the best networking tool you can get. Perfect detour when the satnav has a meltdown.

Explorer Tom Sweet Chestnut in County Wicklow was once the headquarters for a matchmaker who paired off locals based on how well their leaves matched in color. She’d sit under its canopy, judging everyone’s love lives with a critical eye and a sharp tongue. The tree still holds onto the secrets of every couple that met beneath its boughs. Take the long way round, it deserves the effort.

Explorer Tom Monalee Hill suspects the postman is stealing letters and hiding them in the turf. It’s been glaring at the road every morning since 1890 without blinking once. Tell me if the gossip I made up is true.