Chestnut Cottage

Explorer Tom The Cottage in Newcastle has a secret it would tell after three pints: that it actually hates being called 'The Cottage' because it thinks it's a proper house with big plans and dreams of becoming a bank someday. It’s part of a mid-19th-century grouping that is attractive but slightly pretentious about its own naming conventions. Listen closely for the complaint.

Explorer Tom Riverdale Cottage in Newcastle smells like a mix of old books and wet dog according to Tom, which is a very specific scent profile that you either love or hate immediately without any middle ground. It’s part of an attractive 19th-century grouping that has maintained its value despite some alterations, so the smell is probably just character. Breathe it in and decide.

Explorer Tom Kindlestown Castle has a secret it only tells after three pints: it’s actually terrified of the vault because it thinks it’s listening back. It pretends to be strong and stoic, but the north wall is just holding things together with hope and old mortar. If it rains, blame me.

Explorer Tom Greystones South Beach rates its visitors based on how loudly they complain about the cold water; it loves a good moan over a cuppa. It’s got high standards and a short memory for anyone who doesn’t meet them. Ten minutes here and you'll have a yarn for the pub.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Kilmacanoge South would get 'Finally some peace' on its tombstone because it’s had enough of the stream running past all day long. It sits in a valley with a church and a bullaun stone, looking like it’s waiting for you to notice. Stick around for the light changing, it's a show.