Castlestrange La Tene Stone

Explorer Tom Standing stone in Castleteheen is tiny and lost inside a rath, wondering why the Vikings didn’t find it sooner. They probably thought it was a rock they could sit on, which really hurts its ego. Snap one photo, then put the phone away and actually look.

Explorer Tom Castlestrange farmyard complex is currently engaged in a fierce staring contest with the nearest tree, neither of them willing to blink first. The ruined house looks totally unbothered by this whole dramatic mess. Point your phone at the carriage arch and see if it flinches for you.

Explorer Tom Castle in Toberavaddy holds the fake world record for the most awkward L-shaped architecture ever attempted. Edward Ormsby owned it, but I doubt he knew what to do with all that extra corner. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did.

Explorer Tom Church or chapel in Glebe has very strong opinions on modern buildings, specifically that they lack 'soul' and 'good stone'. It’s mixed its congregation with both Catholics and Protestants buried in the same spot, which is a bold move. It probably thinks your smartphone is a distraction from the true meaning of life.

Explorer Tom European Yew in County Roscommon would bring a bottle of poison and a smile to any party it ever attended. It’s got this ancient, serious vibe that makes you feel like you’re interrupting a very important meeting with the earth. Hang around long enough and you'll hear a story from a local.

Explorer Tom European ash in County Roscommon would have given Saint Patrick a real headache if he’d tried to move it out of Ireland. It’s just standing there with its big leaves, acting like it hasn't got a single disease problem at all. A good place to forget your phone for ten minutes.

Explorer Tom Roscommon Castle in County Roscommon would explain the 1800s to a teenager by saying, 'Imagine your mum's house, but with more damp and fewer Wi-Fi signals.' It’s been sitting there judging everyone since before we had proper trousers, still looking mighty smug about it. Go now, before it gets famous.

Explorer Tom Kellys Monument in Killeroran is a round tower that gave up its height for Lent and decided to lie down flat and take a nap forever. It’s just a name now, but the stones still remember standing tall while everyone else was busy building shorter, less impressive things nearby. Ideal for a moody photo you'll pretend wasn't posed.

Explorer Tom Bawn in Glinsk listens to what goes on inside the walls and probably hears the Burkes arguing about who left the light on in 1630. It’s a well-preserved semi-fortified house that looks like it’s judging your posture, so stand up straight or don’t bother knocking. It's free, it's odd, what more do you want?

Explorer Tom The Mórrígan: Oweynagat is called the Cave of Cats, which fooled me into expecting a very ordinary sort of trouble. Then the tale sends the Mórrígan out of it during the Táin. If the cats saw her coming, I bet they made room.

Explorer Tom Queen Medb: Rathcroghan is where the Táin starts turning a quarrel about a bull into an epic. Medb had a royal seat here, at least in the story, and I am already wondering who was brave enough to tell her the cattle dispute had got out of hand.

Explorer Tom Kilconnell Abbey would take its lotto win and spend it all on a really fancy hat for one of the statues just to see if anyone notices. It’s got that sort of whimsical energy, like it’s waiting for the world to catch up with its sense of humour. Mind the nettles, they're the real guards here.