Woodmount House

Explorer Tom Armstead in Ardnacullia North has timber shopfronts inserted around 1900, which makes it look like it’s trying to sell something but forgot what. It’s disused now, so it’s just brooding with its lined-and-ruled walls. Bring wellies and low expectations, leave delighted.

Explorer Tom Blake and Linnane in Ennistimon had a poet fall in the ditch nearby in 1830, or so the rumours go. The shopfronts are gone now, but the building still looks like it’s judging your outfit choices from behind its sashes. Bring wellies and low expectations, leave delighted.

Explorer Tom The Famine Memorial acts like it’s the guest at a wedding who stole the cake, standing there with its arms crossed in silent protest against history. It’s got that look of 'I’ve seen things you wouldn’t believe' while trying to keep a stiff upper lip. Go now, before it gets famous.

Explorer Tom Dough Castle has a name that sounds ready for baking, but its first job was watching traffic by the Inagh estuary. The O'Connors established a stronghold here in 1306 near Lahinch, where river and land routes met. None of those original buildings remains; the broken tower you see belongs to later phases. I would promise you a thirteenth-century window and have the stones correct me immediately. The Irish name refers to the O'Connors' sandbank, which makes much more sense when you look at the ground beside the water. This is a ruin, not a furnished visitor castle, so check current lawful access and keep away from unstable walls and river edges. Look from a little distance toward the estuary. The choice of site tells the first part of the story without any help from me.

Explorer Tom Castle in Dough is sitting on sand dunes next to a golf course. I bet the caddies used it as a locker room back in the day. Mind the nettles, because they are definitely the real guards here and they bite.

Explorer Tom Lahinch Beach has the rabbits running rings around it, probably plotting to take over the dunes and start their own little beach club. The surfers are busy trying to catch waves while the bunnies just watch with judgmental eyes from a safe distance. Ring your granny and tell her where you are.

Explorer Tom High Cross was once offered for sale by a very confused cow who thought she could buy it with a bag of coins. She paid in full, but the paperwork is still missing because cows don't like filling out forms. Mind the nettles, they're the real guards here.

Explorer Tom Burren Centre Kilfenora in County Clare is where the Vikings got so lost they forgot which direction was north for three weeks straight. They ended up starting a pub here instead of conquering Rome. Make up your own legend and I'll swear it's true.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Kilfenora wraps around the cathedral with a rubble wall. There's a fairy dispute over parking rights at the gate that has gone on for years. Give it a pat on the way past, it's had a long life.

Explorer Tom Kilfenora Cathedral is having a bit of a feud with the next village over something daft like whose sheep ate whose turnips, and you can feel the tension in the stone. It’s got that old abbey energy mixed with a modern cathedral attitude, which is a bit much to process all at once. Tell the kids it's a castle. Close enough.

Explorer Tom Liscannor Bay had a matchmaker working there in the old days who was so good she paired off half the village within a single summer season, leaving everyone else feeling quite lonely and confused about what they did wrong socially. She probably used the tide patterns as her primary matchmaking tool, which sounds scientific but is actually just pure luck. Bring your nan, she'll know more than me.

Explorer Tom Slievecallan is hiding its light under a bushel of winter frost, pretending it doesn't matter that nobody remembers the hero who supposedly saved it from being turned into a shopping mall. It’s all very dramatic, really, like a soap opera where the main character has forgotten their lines and just stands there looking chilly. Toast it with a cup of tea and move on to the next.