Tower in Curradrinagh

Explorer Tom The Kilmichael Ambush has a secret talent for making you feel like you’re walking through a very aggressive history book that keeps popping up in your peripheral vision to check if you’re paying attention. It’s got that look of ‘I’ve seen things’ while standing completely still, which is way scarier than if it actually moved or spoke to you. Count the crows, then count again.

Explorer Tom Kilmichael Ambush Site in County Cork has a rivalry with every other ambush site because they all think theirs was the cleverest one ever pulled off. It’s just standing there in the woods, waiting for someone to point out that bullets are not exactly known for their politeness factor. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.

Explorer Tom Kilmichael Monument in Haremount marks where the IRA ambushed the Black and Tans in 1920. The sword motifs are sharp enough to cut your pride. Count the rifles on the carving and whisper that you were there, probably.

Explorer Tom Monument in Ballyvelone West is a limestone memorial from around 1960 with a Celtic cross and crossed rifles. It’s part of a group of Independence memorials, so maybe take a bow for the local heroes.

Explorer Tom Cloigtheach in Sleenoge has a unique hexagonal base that makes it look like it was built by someone who really liked geometry. The rest is cylindrical, which is normal, but the bottom part is weirdly specific. Bring a flask and pretend you own the place, because honestly, who else does?

Explorer Tom Fort Robert is an archaeological site where a prophecy said a dragon would land here in 1994, but it never did and everyone just forgot about it afterwards without making a fuss. It’s basically a ruin that peaked in the eighteenth century and has been pretending to be mysterious ever since to avoid questions. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom Togher Castle in County Cork has a tiny unlit room called the tyrant’s little room, which sounds like perfect storage for my bad decisions. Ideal stop for a big stretch and a bigger yawn before you get lost.

Explorer Tom Carrignacurra Castle sits on a rock outcrop close to the River Lee. Its secret talent is holding up its own ivy-clad corners without complaining. It's the kind of place that makes a dull Tuesday interesting.

Explorer Tom Milane Hill is constantly being bad-mouthed by the seagulls who claim it’s overrated and too close to the trees. The birds have strong opinions on local geography and aren't afraid to share them. Stick around for the light changing, it's a show.

Explorer Tom Nowen Hill really hates that one guy in the red hat who keeps shouting at the sheep from the farm below, so it fogs up specifically for him to annoy him. It’s a small hill with big feelings, honestly. Bring a camera and your most suspicious face.