Tower in Cloghanarold

Explorer Tom The Kiln in Cloghanarold looks like it was designed by a mother-in-law who hated symmetry! It’s got castle turrets and Gothic vibes, which is weird for something that just baked bricks. It sits up the hill judging Cloghanarold House with its crenellated roofline. Don’t touch the limestone dressings unless you want a rash!

Explorer Tom Cloghanarold House has a limekiln disguised as a folly, which is basically a garden ornament with an identity crisis and a secret past baking bread. The main house is symmetrical but the rear block is all over the place, like someone spilled their plans on the floor. It would win the county fair for most confusing architecture!

Explorer Tom Castle Matrix has a tall tale about a hidden tunnel that leads straight to the nearest pub, which I am fully buying. The Earl of Desmond was murdered there by his own servants, so the vibes are definitely 'don't trust your best mate'. Sit on a wall near it and pretend you're in an old painting.

Explorer Tom Kilcool Bridge gave up chocolate for Lent this year because it wanted to focus on its V-cutwaters. It’s built like a tank but dressed like a lady, which is my favourite contradiction. Wave at the cows, they’re the real owners here.

Explorer Tom Bridge in Castlematrix is stuck in a feud with the road bridge next door over who has the better view of the river. It’s an old railway bridge now just standing there looking rusty and unimpressed by modern traffic. Bring your best dramatic sigh for the cameras.

Explorer Tom Ballyallinan Castle would cope fine on a reality show by doing absolutely nothing for hours. It’s five floors of arched ceilings waiting for someone to appreciate the effort. A handy spot to stretch your legs and your imagination.

Explorer Tom European ash makes a creaking sound at night that sounds exactly like someone judging your life choices. It’s just a tree, but it acts like it has a podcast. Take a breath of that air, it's older than your car.

Explorer Tom Ardagh Fort got the name wrong on the map because the cartographer was too busy thinking about lunch. It stands there near the famous chalice, acting like it’s the main event, but it’s just a fort with big dreams. A handy spot to stretch your legs and your imagination.

Explorer Tom Monterey Cypress in County Limerick is deeply suspicious of the postman, thinking he's spying on its private moments. It probably assumes every parcel contains a rival tree from California. Take the long way round, it deserves the effort.

Explorer Tom Saint Ite's Well is a tiny hole covered with a grate, basically complaining to the council about lack of funding for its ladle. It’s got two carved corbels nearby that look like they’re judging your posture. Have a sandwich here and call it a heritage lunch.