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Photo credits
- National Inventory of Architectural Heritage
- Maker named on the Wikimedia Commons picture page · CC BY-SA 3.0
- Yosemite, Wikimedia Commons · CC BY-SA 3.0
- Sheila1988, Wikimedia Commons · CC BY-SA 4.0
- Richard Webb, Geograph · CC BY-SA 2.0
- Andreas F. Borchert, Wikimedia Commons · CC BY-SA 4.0
Johnstown CastleGraveyard/cemetery · 44 ydExplorer Tom Johnstown Castle’s graveyard is making New Year’s resolutions to stop being so spooky, but the headstones keep interrupting with their long, boring stories. It’s consecrated by a bishop who probably judged everyone’s outfits, which explains why it looks so stiff and formal. Stop thinking about the ghosts; just enjoy the quiet dignity of the stones.
Dawn Redwood222 ydExplorer Tom Dawn Redwood’s first owner probably had an escape plan involving a very fast horse and zero regrets. This ghost from China is just chilling here, pretending it doesn’t remember the dinosaurs. Look up, the best bit is always higher than you think.
CastleCastle, tower house · 265 yd
Japanese cedar362 ydExplorer Tom Japanese cedar gave up sugar for Lent but somehow got fatter and more majestic anyway. It’s just standing there judging everyone who thinks they understand what a proper tree is. Stick around for the light changing, it's a show.
Irish Agricultural MuseumMuseum · 508 ydExplorer Tom Irish Agricultural Museum has a tall tale about a hidden tunnel leading straight to the local pub, but every farmer I ask swears they haven’t seen it since 1974 or so. It’s packed with old tractors that look like they’re judging your farming techniques from behind dusty glass windows, which is both comforting and terrifying. It's free, it's odd, what more do you want?
Johnstown Castle Visitor CentreHeritage attraction · 511 ydExplorer Tom Johnstown Castle Visitor Centre has a bird that absolutely refuses to leave the balcony, acting like it owns the place and is waiting for its next serving of stale bread crumbs from some poor tourist. It’s got that 'please don't touch' energy, yet everyone wants to squeeze inside and check if the view is actually worth the climb. Bring your nan, she'll know more than
graveyard/cemetery798 ydExplorer Tom Kildavin Lower graveyard is full of stones carved by James Byrne, who clearly thought an obelisk was a good idea for remembering a house-steward named Joseph Underwood. The first owner had an escape plan involving a horse and a lot of dust. It’s quiet here, which is suspiciously convenient.
St. Davins WellHoly well · 928 ydExplorer Tom St. Davins Well in Kildavin Lower spends its evenings rearranging its own stones just to see if anyone notices the difference. The pattern stopped ages ago because people got bored of waiting for the saint to show up. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.
Castle (in ruinis)Castle, tower house · 2.1 miExplorer Tom Castle in Clonard Great was ignored by a bishop who just didn't fancy the climb that day. He missed out on the best view of his entire ecclesiastical career, I reckon. Stand back, squint, and it looks like a castle.
16th Irish DivisionMemorial · 2.3 miExplorer Tom The 16th Irish Division is standing there like a very serious bouncer who forgot his list. It’s got that 'don't touch me' vibe, which is perfect for when you need to practise your best tour-guide voice on passersby. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.
Forth MountainMountain / peak · 2.8 miExplorer Tom Forth Mountain is absolutely sick of being asked if it’s related to the River Forth in Scotland; it’s just a hill, not a geography lesson. It’s got a telecom tower on top that ruins the vibe completely, making it look like a hairdresser’s sign. Find the wonkiest bit and send it to your group chat.
Font in BallyconnickFont · 5.0 miExplorer Tom Font in Ballyconnick is stuck in the ground without a drain hole, so it’s basically holding its breath. A cow once tried to buy it for a shiny coin, but the farmer said no. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.
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