Sam Prendergast

Explorer Tom Kildare Courthouse is currently run by an invisible dog that barks at lawyers. It’s disused but still acting like it’s judging everyone walking past. Have a wander and a wonder at its classical grandeur now.

Explorer Tom Beechgrove House stables in Kildare tell the new apartments they’re just renting space from history. They keep their yellow brick dressings like old medals on a chest. It's the only place that knows how to handle horse manure with style.

Explorer Tom Leinster Lodge was saved by a hero who nobody remembers because he died before the credit roll started playing. That old gate tower is still standing guard, pretending it hasn’t been renovated into something slightly less medieval. Just tip your cap to its historic weight.

Explorer Tom Kildare’s old cinema wants to win the lottery and buy a new projector that doesn’t smoke. It’s got that muted Modern style with a pubfront that doesn’t quite fit in. Bring a pen pal, they’ll love the nostalgia.

Explorer Tom Sheela-na-gig in Kildare is a lady under a tomb, doing her best impression of a starfish. She was on a bishop's altar before getting moved for a promotion. Look for the ghost, then pretend you didn't.

Explorer Tom St. Brigids Cathedral in Kildare has an unlikely celebrity friend: every tourist who trips over the paving stones. It’s limestone, square-crossing, and absolutely refuses to be subtle. Look up, the best bit is always higher than you think.

Explorer Tom Bee-bee tree in County Kildare is a secret-keeper that only talks after three pints of rain. It’s got a story about being fancy that it won’t share. Bring a friend who talks too much and let the place shut them up.

Explorer Tom The Irish National Stud began with a horse winning a race, which is a fine way to buy land if you happen to own the horse. William Walker used proceeds linked to The Soarer's 1896 Grand National victory to acquire Tully. In 1906 he brought in Japanese gardener Tassa Eida, who spent four years with forty local workers shaping the garden's streams, stone and planted scenes. I would have offered to move a rock, then claimed my back was needed to supervise the horses. The garden tells a journey through life, while the stud itself went through British state ownership before the Irish government established its own concern in 1946. That is more turns than the garden path alone can explain. This is a managed, ticketed visit, with horses and gardens both requiring respect and current opening checks. Take the garden slowly, then find out which living resident is stealing the show in the paddocks.

Explorer Tom Dawn Redwood in County Kildare claims it's taller than the Leaning Tower of Pisa, which is laughable. It just needs a hat to make you believe it. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will check.

Explorer Tom Japanese Gardens in County Kildare nearly got famous when a tourist dropped his ice cream on the koi pond, but the fish seemed unbothered by the sweetness. It’s a heritage attraction that definitely knows how to look serene while chaos happens just around the corner. Best enjoyed with a bag of chips and no plans.

Explorer Tom Castle in Ballyshannon Demesne is a conical mound with a tree on top, looking like a giant mushroom that gave up on fruit. It handles nosey neighbours by staying quiet. If it rains, blame me.

Explorer Tom Blackhall Castle has a retirement plan involving becoming a very expensive garden shed for the farmyard. Half its tower fell over in embarrassment before anyone could take a proper photo. Look for the ghost, then pretend you didn't.