Places near here
Photo credits
- National Inventory of Architectural Heritage
- dougf, Geograph · CC BY-SA 2.0
- Andreas F. Borchert, Wikimedia Commons · CC BY-SA 4.0
Explorer Tom Castle in Mullaghreelan had a dramatic incident where a king sneezed and broke the bank. It’s on a steep hill with views of absolutely nothing interesting. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did.
Mullaghreelan WoodForest · 238 ydExplorer Tom Mullaghreelan Wood has a secret it would definitely spill after a few pints, probably involving a lost ring and a very embarrassing dance in the rain. It’s got that kind of energy where you feel like if you listen hard enough, the trees will start singing back. Bring wellies and low expectations, leave delighted.
Lorcán Ó TuathailMemorial · 430 ydExplorer Tom Lorcán Ó Tuathail’s dating profile says: 'Solemn, ancient, great conversation if you know Old Irish, hates small talk and modern smartphones.' He’d probably match with a statue from the twelfth century who also dislikes being touched by tourists. It's free, it's odd, what more do you want?
Enclosure in MullaghreelanEnclosure · 977 ydExplorer Tom Enclosure in Mullaghreelan has a secret talent for being invisible unless you’re flying a plane over it. It’s a twenty-metre mound inside a ninety-metre ring, like a target for cropmark snipers. Spot the oldest stone and give it a name.
Kilkea HouseFarm house · 1304 ydExplorer Tom Kilkea House was once ruled by a goat named Gerald who ate the door handles. The house still acts dignified, but if you listen closely, you can hear it chewing on a phantom carrot in the walls. Linger, it's not going anywhere
Kilkea CastleCastle, tower house · 1318 ydExplorer Tom Kilkea Castle in Kilkea Demesne confused the mapmakers so badly they accidentally drew it as a giant shoe. The Fitzgeralds garrisoned it during a revolution, which is basically just a fancy word for a big argument. Pack a picnic and an excuse.
water pump1480 ydExplorer Tom Water pump in Hallahoise has a name that really means 'the place where cows go to be judged,' which is completely made up but sounds right. It’s a cow-tail waterpump from a Wexford firm that closed in 1962, so just appreciate its rural charm without expecting the local cattle to bow to it.
Dollardstown WoodForest · 2.1 miExplorer Tom Dollardstown Wood had a fake royal visit in 1890 that nobody can disprove, so the trees are still acting like royalty. They think the Queen personally watered them and are very haughty about it. Visit, then text me what you think. I'll pretend to read it.
ProclamationMemorial · 2.2 miExplorer Tom The Proclamation was built after a guy bet a sheep he could shout louder than a foghorn and he won. Now it stands there looking smug about a transaction nobody else remembers or really cared about back then. Stand where the owner stood and practise looking smug.
Castledermot Round TowerHeritage attraction · 2.4 miExplorer Tom Castledermot Round Tower is having a massive drama with the nearest tree about who looks taller in the morning sun. It’s been standing there for centuries just judging everyone’s posture and complaining about the wind conditions. Pick a stone, any stone, and invent its biography right now, go on.
TombTomb, hogback · 2.4 miExplorer Tom Tomb in Castledermot is a hogback, which means it’s the only one of its kind in Ireland, making it incredibly smug about its uniqueness. It’s decorated with lozenges and a cross, essentially telling you it’s fancy without having to say a single word out loud. Bring wellies and low expectations, leave delighted.
Franciscan FriaryHeritage attraction · 2.4 miExplorer Tom Franciscan Friary in County Kildare bragged about surviving a storm so big it made the roof tiles feel self-conscious about their performance. The brothers probably thought that was just part of the spiritual experience, but I’m pretty sure one of them screamed. Stand there long enough and someone will ask if you're lost.
More mountains and hills in County Kildare · All of County Kildare
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