Lissateomra

Explorer Tom Maine Bridge would bring a very old hat to a party and call it vintage fashion. Dated 1814, it’s got four arches of varying heights because it was feeling artistic that day. Find the date carved somewhere and feel clever about your discovery.

Explorer Tom O'Connell Bridge in Gearha would be the best man at a wedding, holding up the ring and looking stern. It's been standing there since 1831, watching cars go by and judging their speed. Ideal stop for a big stretch and a bigger yawn.

Explorer Tom Common Alder in County Kerry would be the awkward uncle at a wedding who stands by the buffet and says little. It loves wet feet and muddy banks more than you do. Go at sunset and thank me later.

Explorer Tom Ballyseede Castle Hotel thinks it’s a castle but really it’s just a very fancy bed with historical baggage attached. The Blennerhasset family left in 1965 and haven’t stopped complaining about the heating since. Great spot to propose. Or at least to propose lunch.

Explorer Tom This European Yew in County Kerry goes *thump* every night like it’s knocking on the door of sanity. Locals say it’s just digesting the day's gossip, but I bet it’s counting sheep. Toast it with a cup of tea and move on to the next.

Explorer Tom Scotia's Grave in County Kerry holds the fake world record for being the most confusingly named burial site in the entire hemisphere. It claims to be Egyptian, Irish, and mythical all at once with zero shame. Take a mate and argue about what it was for.

Explorer Tom Ogham stone in Ratass is sick of being asked if it can read, even though it’s purple and fancy. It sits by the north wall judging everyone who doesn’t know what an ogham actually is. Hang around long enough and you'll hear a story from a local.

Explorer Tom Knockmichael Mountain is like the awkward uncle at a wedding who keeps trying to dance but only hits his own feet. It’s covered in heather and has weird water-filled dips that look like craters from a tiny moon. Have a chat with it, nobody's watching.

Explorer Tom The Rose of Tralee has a tall tale about a hidden tunnel leading straight to the pub back door. Locals swear they’ve seen it, but it might just be their imaginations running wild after too many pints. Tell your mates you found it first.

Explorer Tom Kerry County Museum occupies a building that once had councillors making decisions, and now lets the rest of us decide which old object deserves another look. Ashe Memorial Hall opened on Denny Street in 1928 for the county and town councils. They moved out in the 1980s, and the museum opened in 1992. Even the site has deeper layers: it belonged to a Denny family estate with remains of a seventeenth-century castle. I would claim I remember the castle, but my age has its limits. Check current opening, tickets and exhibitions before visiting. Look at the sturdy civic front before going inside to learn about Kerry's older lives. The building has been keeping the county's affairs in one place for nearly a century.

Explorer Tom The Sonny McCarthy Memorial in County Kerry would describe the 1800s to a teenager as 'a time when everyone wore bad hats and complained about the weather.' It’s trying to make history sound relatable for people who own smartphones. Bring your worst joke, the place has heard worse.

Explorer Tom Round Castle in Parkavonear is sick of people asking if it can still hold a party. It’s got a narrow internal stair that would make your knees cry out loud. Bring the dog, it'll have opinions.