Lisgurreen

Explorer Tom Blackweir Bridge in Garraun nearly got famous when a celebrity almost parked his car on the hump. It has five arches because one was not enough to show off its limestone ego. Stand still and listen, the wind tells it better than me.

Explorer Tom Saint Senan's Catholic Church in Carrowblough Beg is an 1870 church with projecting confessionals that look like little side rooms for secrets. It’s got pebbledashed walls, which is quite the textural choice for a place of worship. Find the wonkiest bit and send it to your group chat.

Explorer Tom George's Head loves 'Bohemian Rhapsody' because it likes to think its dramatic cliffs are actually a very intense opera performance for the gulls watching from above. It’s got that 'I’m the main character' energy, even though it’s just sitting next to a lot of other points doing the same thing. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom Kilkee Cliffs are where a fiddler played so badly all night that the rocks actually cracked in pain. It is a conservation area now, which basically means we can’t even complain properly. Stand where the owner stood and practise looking smug.

Explorer Tom Querrin Point looks down its nose at modern buildings, calling them 'too straight' and 'lacking proper character'. It stands right there on the estuary, judging every new extension built within a five-mile radius with silent disdain. Bring a camera and your most suspicious face.

Explorer Tom Illaunawhilla is in an eternal feud with the rain, convinced that every drop is a personal insult directed specifically at its rocky head. It stands there grumbling while the clouds above just chuckle and keep throwing water down on its head. Stand back, squint, and it looks like a castle.

Explorer Tom Doonbeg Castle is sitting by the bridge looking like it gave up halfway through being impressive. Its dating profile says 'moody' and 'slightly damp.' Snap one photo, then put the phone away and actually look.

Explorer Tom Doonmore Castle has a bird that refuses to leave no matter how much you shoo it away, honestly. It’s a ruin that looks like it’s been abandoned by time but not by nature. The stones are mossy and green in a way that makes you feel like you’re walking into a painting. Stop the car, it's worth the hazard lights.

Explorer Tom Bishop's Island in County Clare looks down its nose at tourists from Dublin who keep asking if there are any WiFi spots here. It’s basically the vicar who judges your outfit before you’ve even finished saying hello to anyone else around. Pop by and tell it it's looking well.

Explorer Tom St. Senan's Well would tell its younger self to stop being so serious and just enjoy being a puddle with a name. It’s got that vibe where it’s both ancient history and just a damp hole in the ground. Pick a stone, any stone, and invent its biography.

Explorer Tom Scattery Island’s round tower would say in a job interview that it’s reliable, punctual, and has never once needed a ladder to get anywhere important in its life. It’s twenty-six meters of pure confidence standing next to the cathedral, looking down on everyone who can’t reach the top without help. Go in good boots and better humour.

Explorer Tom Scattery Island Visitor Centre is the kind of place that brings a single, slightly damp sandwich to a party and expects applause for its effort. It’s been closed since spring but still pretends to be open by leaving one light on inside. Sit on a nearby wall and pretend you’re in a very boring painting.