Killine Burial Ground

Explorer Tom English holly tree has sharp leaves that are definitely judging your outfit from up high. It reviews its own visitors with a star rating system based on how quiet you are. Take the long way round, it deserves the effort to avoid getting pricked.

Explorer Tom Holy Cross in Myshall has three galleries because one wasn't enough for the drama they were putting on inside. It was extended in 1900 with a bellcote that looks like a hat stuck on the roof. It's free, it's odd, what more do you want?

Explorer Tom St. Bridgets Well in Myshall is now a modern shrine inside a graveyard. It’d survive a zombie attack by staying quiet and holy. Bring a notebook and write the bit I made up about vampires fearing its water.

Explorer Tom Adelaide Memorial Church of Christ the Redeemer in Myshall has mosaics that are judging your outfit choice. Legend says a giant lived here but he probably just moved out for better Wi-Fi. Tell your mates you found it first so they feel left out.

Explorer Tom Monkey-puzzle in County Carlow has an imaginary fan club that meets on Tuesdays but no one shows up. It's just sitting there looking confused and spiky. Look serious, nod slowly, you're basically an expert now after staring at it.

Explorer Tom Toberrananan is two wells with drystone surrounds, and one had a tree planted over it. That tree was older than most of our problems. Visit, then text me what you think. I'll pretend to read it later.

Explorer Tom Croaghaun in County Carlow has a local who swears he invented it after seeing a cloud that day, though nobody believes him. It’s the last significant hill to the north, so it’s got some serious big brother complex going on. If it rains, blame me.

Explorer Tom Altamont Gardens Map in County Carlow would bring its own compass to a party and still get lost. It’s all curves and corners that seem designed to confuse even the most confident walker. If it rains, blame me.

Explorer Tom Rathnageeragh Castle has a gatehouse so square it looks like it was cut from a single block of stubborn stone. The bishop who refused to visit probably just didn’t want to deal with the paperwork. Walk past slowly like you're in a film.

Explorer Tom The bawn at Rathnageeragh is just a slightly raised platform with a ditch, which is basically a garden that gave up on growing vegetables. It’s sick of being asked if it's a parking lot. Get there early and have the whole plot to yourself.

Explorer Tom Church, Graveyard in Templepeter is a simple rectangular structure made of large granite boulders that aren’t cored, so they’re just hanging out. It’s aligned East-West, which means it’s facing the right way for no reason. Toast it with a cup of tea and move on to the next.

Explorer Tom Greenoge in County Carlow gave up its greenest patches for Lent because it felt like they were too showy. Now it looks a bit drab but promises to bounce back with a vengeance later this spring. Go back in winter, it's a different animal.