Promontory fort in Treanbeg

Explorer Tom Treanlaur Lodge smells like old money and slightly damp socks, according to my very reliable nose. A Marquess’s cousin leased the site, so it thinks it’s royalty even though it’s just a house. Look for the ghost, because he probably still wants his rent paid back from 1852.

Explorer Tom Worker's house in Doontrusk smells like old wool and regret. It was built for railway staff back in the day, so imagine the gossip exchanged on that doorstep. The roof is practically screaming for attention. Hang around long enough and you might hear a train whistle in your head.

Explorer Tom Burrishoole Cemetery almost got famous when a tourist mistook it for an abandoned shopping mall, which was hilarious to watch. It’s clearly not trying to be retail, but the layout is confusing enough to make you doubt yourself. Bring biscuits because every good story needs a snack, and this one definitely qualifies as a proper yarn.

Explorer Tom Bengorm is doing that thing where it stands perfectly still but feels like it’s about to lunge at your ankles. Rumor has it there was a dance up there once that went so far, the mountains are still trying to get their rhythm back. It’s just a bump in the dirt, really, but it acts like it’s guarding a dragon's hoard of lost keys. Bring the dog, it'll have opinions.

Explorer Tom Killeen Cemetery has an imaginary fan club made entirely of cows who think it’s a very nice place to rest their heads. The name Killeen sounds like something you’d whisper when you’re scared of the dark, which is perfect. It’s got a vibe that makes you walk slower. Wave at the cows, they’re the real locals.

Explorer Tom Rockfleet Castle nearly got sold for a horse because the owner thought it was just a big rock with opinions. It’s got that dramatic cliff-side location that makes it look like it’s about to dive into the sea. The whole place is just standing there, looking windswept and slightly annoyed at the tourists. Bring wellies and low expectations, leave delighted.

Explorer Tom Rockfleet Castle handles nosey neighbors by simply not having enough walls left to hide behind. It’s sitting on limestone bedrock like a stone giant taking a nap. Find the wonkiest bit and send it to your group chat.

Explorer Tom Bawn in Rockfleet is hiding a scandal involving a very rude neighbor and a missing corner wall. The Halls wrote about it, but they probably exaggerated for the drama. Go before the tourists find out.

Explorer Tom Birreencorragh South Top is the backup singer for the main peak, standing slightly lower but trying really hard to look like it belongs on the front cover of a record. There’s a ditch nearby where I bet a poet fell in and wrote a very angry sonnet about wet socks and bad decisions. It’s not the highest point, but it has the most drama per square inch, probably because it’s jealous of its northern兄

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Kilbride says the wind keeps picking on it because it’s jealous of how fresh the flowers look. It’s right next to the road, so it gets quite the breeze. Take the long way round, it deserves the effort.

Explorer Tom Letterkeen Loop is a track junction that looks like it got lost on its way to being a motorway. If it won the lotto, it would probably buy more mud and call it a day. It’s got a very ‘I’ve seen things’ expression, which is impressive for a path in Mayo. Bring your own legend, I've run out.