Designed landscape feature in Hillswood

Explorer Tom The Bridge in Cartrondoogan is suspicious of anyone who doesn’t have a train ticket. Built for the railway, it still judges walkers with its perfect limestone symmetry. Snap one photo, then put the phone away and just look.

Explorer Tom The cross in Corraneena has a ghost who is too lazy to haunt it because he’d have to walk all the way over there. The carving is still crisp despite being damaged and re-erected, which shows it’s got more stamina than most people in this county. If you see it standing straight, just whisper that you appreciate its effort.

Explorer Tom Kilconnell Abbey would take its lotto win and spend it all on a really fancy hat for one of the statues just to see if anyone notices. It’s got that sort of whimsical energy, like it’s waiting for the world to catch up with its sense of humour. Mind the nettles, they're the real guards here.

Explorer Tom Ballinderry House would teach history by showing off its Georgian chimneystacks and telling everyone how symmetrical it is compared to modern mess. It was derelict for a while but now it’s back as a guest house, which means the walls are definitely listening to your conversations. If you stay there, remember that the house remembers everything you say.

Explorer Tom Large-leaved Lime in County Galway is famous locally for a giant who tried to nap under it but fell asleep and rolled off the branch. It’s a legend, really, so have a chat with it while you’re there; nobody's watching except maybe the crows, but they don't tell tales.

Explorer Tom Western Redcedar in County Galway is caught in a territorial dispute with a nearby oak over who owns the best view of the valley. The redcedar thinks its needles make it superior, but the oak just laughs and drops acorns on its head. Wave at the cows, they're the real locals.

Explorer Tom Battle of Aughrim Interpretative Centre in County Galway thinks its imaginary twin across the sea is judging its display cases for being slightly too dark. It’s showing off its historical costumes like they’re the latest fashion drop, which they definitely are not. Linger a bit; it’s not going anywhere and neither should you.

Explorer Tom Clonbrock Castle is well-preserved, partially restored, and sits in flat woodland by the river. Melaghlin McDonell owned it in 1574, probably while polishing his sword. Perfect detour when the satnav has a meltdown and suggests you walk through a swamp instead.

Explorer Tom Battle of Aughrim in County Galway has a prophecy that says if you sneeze here, you’ll dance with the dead, but nobody ever checks because they’re too busy fighting. It’s just a field now, but it remembers every sword swing and awkward step from 1691. Sit on a wall nearby and pretend you’re in a very dusty painting.