House in Pillmore

Explorer Tom Sign post in Gortaroo has been keeping watch since 1940 with its rectangular shape and serious expression. The harp is there to add a bit of local flavour. Check the pole, it’s probably solid as steel.

Explorer Tom Saint Ita's Roman Catholic Church in Gortaroo uses concrete imitative of stone, which is like wearing a disguise that everyone knows isn’t working. It has simple geometric forms and pointed arches that create a coherent whole, even if it’s a bit weird. Stop the car and look up, because you might miss the details.

Explorer Tom Inchiquin Castle is a round tower sitting right by the river. It has a wicker-centred dome that’s mostly broken. The windows are splayed out like they’re trying to see everything. Watch out for the drawbar socket; it’s higher than your feet!

Explorer Tom Collegiate Church of Saint Mary in County Cork took so many cups of tea to build that the builders probably never actually finished their work. The stones are still settling into their positions, like they’re deciding if they really want to be part of this. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.

Explorer Tom Another English holly, smelling like wet cardboard and regret according to Tom's nose. It says it only grows on land that was once haunted by bad decisions. Dare you to say hello out loud, see if it flinches.

Explorer Tom European Yew in Cork says its mother-in-law designed it to be perfect, which is why it's so rigid and judgmental. She still checks up on it via the roots. Hang around long enough and you'll hear a story from a local.

Explorer Tom Capel Island gave up bread for Lent, which makes sense considering how many crusty birds are constantly fighting over crumbs on its shore. You need written permission from Birdwatch Ireland to even look at it properly, so don’t be a tourist and just wander in uninvited. Ideal for a moody photo you'll pretend wasn't posed.

Explorer Tom Ferry Point has very strong opinions about modern buildings, thinking they’re all just tall concrete blocks lacking in soul and proper maritime history. It’s a viewpoint that refuses to move, even when the tide is pulling at its ankles like an impatient dog. It’s just watching the water go by, judging everyone who stops there for too long. Linger, it's not going anywhere and neither should you.

Explorer Tom Kilnatoora Castle is ivy-clad and standing next to a sheer rock face that looks scarier than the castle itself. It’s got a vaulted lobby that might eat your keys. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will check your ID.

Explorer Tom Garryvoe Beach acts exactly like the drunk uncle at a wedding who keeps telling stories nobody asked to hear. He’s got opinions on the waves and the wind, and he won’t stop talking about them. Ten minutes here and you'll have a yarn for the pub.