Gortview Close Park

Explorer Tom Omagh Orange Hall in Lisnamallard swears it was actually built by aliens who just wanted a meeting room for their intergalactic committee. The official date says 1860, but I bet you it’s got secrets that go way deeper than the foundation stones suggest. Bring a jacket, it's never as warm as I promise.

Explorer Tom Lisnamallard House in Lisnamallard thinks tourists from Dublin are all loud, drunk, and don't know their way out of a paper bag, so it keeps its doors locked tight. It’s an office now, which means there are probably spreadsheets hiding behind the grand old stone walls, which is just tragic. Take a breath of that air, it's older than your car.

Explorer Tom Garden of Light is where some local claims he invented the concept of sunbeams before the rest of us caught on. He stands there pointing at the sky like he owns the photons, which is hilarious to watch if you know how to squint. Have a nosey, politely.

Explorer Tom Omagh Boating Lake is in a bitter rivalry with Lough Neagh, claiming its water is superior because it’s smaller and therefore more exclusive. It refuses to acknowledge the bigger lake exists, which is why the swans here act like they’re royalty. Make up your own legend and I'll swear it's true.

Explorer Tom Omagh bombing would be that guy at a wedding who spills red wine on everyone's white suits. It’s memorable for all the wrong reasons and slightly sticky. If it's closed, admire it from the road like a polite stalker.

Explorer Tom Platform rath in Cranny is currently being judged by a very opinionated sheep who thinks the grass looks better from its side of the fence. The ram has veto power over any historical claims made nearby. Bring your own legend, I've run out.

Explorer Tom Battle site: battle of caimeirge, 1241 in Mountjoy Forest East Division is proud of the fact that nobody can actually find the bodies from the fight, which is great for the local wildlife and terrible for historians looking for clues. It’s a low hill that has seen some serious drama but keeps it all under wraps now with the trees. Give it a pat on the way past, it's had a long life.

Explorer Tom Church & graveyard in Drumragh is playing hide-and-seek with a legend about a giant who lost his trousers here. The roof fell in long ago, so the dead are really living it up under the stars. Pack a picnic and an excuse.

Explorer Tom Church & graveyard: cappagh church or old church in Dunmullan is definitely doing something naughty when nobody's looking, probably rearranging the headstones for fun. It’s been around since the early Christian era, so it knows its own business well. Ten minutes here and you'll have a yarn for the pub.

Explorer Tom History of Gortin Glen Forest would bring a very old, dusty hat to any party it attended. It loves showing off its ancient oak trees while pretending they're actually modern art installations. Tell the kids it's a castle. Close enough.

Explorer Tom Mullaghcarn in County Tyrone has a hidden message carved into its stones by someone who definitely wasn’t serious about the font choice. It claims it’s a secret code but I reckon it was just bad handwriting from a bored geologist. Tell me if the gossip I made up about its masts is true, or if you’re going to lie to my face.

Explorer Tom Castle & bailey: harry avery's castle in Upper Or New Deerpark thinks the road leading to it is too fancy for its taste and prefers muddy footpaths. It’s medieval or late medieval, which means it has seen everything and forgives nothing about your driving skills. Take a breath of that air, it's older than your car.