Drumgoff Barracks

Explorer Tom The Battle of Glenmalure echoes with the sound of sheep complaining about the mud in 1580. Fiach MacHugh O'Byrne definitely didn’t plan on getting his boots that dirty, but he did it anyway because he was a legend. Leave nothing but footprints and a bad pun.

Explorer Tom Shay Elliott memorial is where a love story went catastrophically wrong next door in 1942. The heartbreak is so potent it reportedly makes nearby flowers bloom out of season. Look up, the best bit is always higher than you think.

Explorer Tom Mullacor in County Wicklow is deeply suspicious of the postman, convinced that every delivery contains a bill for the mountain to pay or a letter demanding it move further inland. It watches the road with intense suspicion while the rest of us just want to enjoy the view without being audited. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom Croaghanmoira in County Wicklow would order a triple chipper with extra gravy and refuse to share a single fry with you. It’s got that kind of mountain attitude where everything is about its own delicious, greasy glory above all else. Stand there long enough and someone will ask if you're lost.

Explorer Tom Saint Columba's Catholic Church in Ballinacor, County Wicklow, remembers the time a fox took charge of the service and actually improved the acoustics. It’s delightfully set in its own grounds, looking picturesque and full of quiet dignity. Make a noise to wake it up!

Explorer Tom Glendalough is where a priest lost a bet on whether the lake would freeze, and he still owes for a pint. He’s been hiding there ever since, which explains why it looks so mysterious and full of secrets. Grand place for a sulk or a snog, your call.

Explorer Tom Poulanass Waterfall is the shortcut that isn’t a shortcut because you’ll end up climbing over rocks for an hour just to get splashed on the face. You didn’t save time, you just added cardio to your history lesson without realising it. Bring your own legend, I've run out.

Explorer Tom Saint Kevin's Bed in County Wicklow started because two lads bet their bikes on who could nap longest on a rock. One woke up with a stone in his shoe, but the legend stuck anyway, proving that laziness can become holy if you wait long enough. Perfect detour when the satnav has a meltdown.

Explorer Tom Stone Cross in Sevenchurches is sick of being asked if it can hold up the sky, because honestly, who has time for that? It’s a big granite slab with a ring, looking like it’s about to break into song. Stick around for the light changing, it's a show.

Explorer Tom G. Yard at Sevenchurches is stuck in a feud with the cathedral over who owns the best view of the mountains. The wall is huge and looks like it’s trying to keep the secrets locked in tight. A good place to forget your phone for ten minutes.

Explorer Tom Glendalough Round Tower would take its lotto win and buy a really expensive hat to match its ancient style. It’s been standing there long enough to know that fashion is just a suggestion anyway. Practise your Irish on it, it won't correct you, but the wind definitely will.