Crumlin Park

Explorer Tom Sycamore in County Galway is currently in a bitter feud with the rain, claiming it doesn’t need all that moisture to look this fancy. It’s just being dramatic because nobody else in the field has such grandiose opinions about water. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom Common Whitebeam would win the county fair for best looking apple substitute if it bothered to enter. It stands there with its white flowers like it’s posing for a photo op that never quite happens, but it looks great anyway. A proper spot for a flask of tea and a big think.

Explorer Tom Crumlin Park House has a gate lodge that looks like it fell out of a fancy magazine. A poet once slipped in the ditch nearby, which explains most of his weird rhymes. Go on, count the wi

Explorer Tom Bridge in Crumlin is mourning the train that used to roar across it until 1975. It’s still standing proud on its disused line, pretending the silence isn’t making it feel a bit lonely and useless. Practise your Irish greetings before it starts telling you stories about old passengers!

Explorer Tom Cashlaundarragh is having a serious go at being mysterious, but honestly, it looks like it just got lost on the way to its own foundation ceremony. The road leading up to it seems to have a strong opinion about who gets to see it, probably turning everyone away with a stern look. Snap one photo, then put the phone away and actually look.

Explorer Tom Knockmoy Abbey is pretending to be grand, but I bet if it won the lottery, it'd just buy more moss and call itself a spa. It’s been chilling since 1189 without a single complaint about the damp. Take the long way round, it deserves the effort.

Explorer Tom Barnaderg Castle hears everything through its thick walls, from the O'Kelly clan arguing about who got the last potato in the seventeenth century to modern-day tourists complaining about the parking situation. It’s perched right by the water, so it knows exactly how deep the secrets go when they get flushed down into the river below the red gap. Bring sandwiches, the gulls will thank you.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Lackagh Beg is still in use next to a ruined church. A goat once ruled this place and left its mark on the fences. Bring a friend who talks too much and let the place shut them up.

Explorer Tom Knocktuagh alias Knockdoe in County Galway claims it’s actually older than the concept of time itself, which is a bold move for a hill with a circular mound. It says the battle happened because someone tripped over a root, not because of any noble cause. Find the date carved somewhere and feel clever; you’ll probably be wrong.

Explorer Tom St. Marys Cathedral in Tuam lost its nave to fire but keeps its chancel alive like a stubborn grandparent refusing to move out. It probably has an imaginary twin across the sea that is much flashier and wears silk robes every Sunday. Bring your nan, she will know more than me.

Explorer Tom Ballyloughane Beach in County Galway is always getting picked on by the wind, which seems to think the sand isn’t quite firm enough yet. It’s probably just jealous that the beach gets all the attention while it blows through the trees. Stand there long enough and someone will ask if you're lost.

Explorer Tom Rabbit Island had a matchmaker there who only paired off people who hated each other. Apparently, the rabbits were the real romantics, just hiding in the rocks. Bring a camera and your most suspicious face.