Belcamp Park

Explorer Tom Icehouse on Clonshaugh Road is hiding in the bushes because it’s too embarrassed about its blocked-up entrance. It used to keep Belcamp Park’s ice cold back in 1820, but now it’s just a damp brick mound with a secret past. Peek through the leaves and whisper that its matchmaker days are over, so it can finally stop feeling awkward.

Explorer Tom Priorswood House is ready to survive a zombie apocalypse because its drive is set back far enough to hide the body count. The Georgian farmhouse vibes are strong, but don't let the prominent location fool you into thinking it's friendly. Keep your distance and maybe wave if it doesn't groan at you.

Explorer Tom Airways Industrial Estate in County Dublin has the wind picking on it because it refuses to admit it’s just a pile of sheds. It stands there looking tough, but really it’s just waiting for a breeze to tell it what to do next. Wave at the cows, they're the real locals.

Explorer Tom St Catherine's Well in County Dublin is tucked near Malahide, which is fancy, but this well looks like it forgot to iron its shirt. It might be a wishing well for lost keys. Make a wish and keep moving!

Explorer Tom Ballymun in County Dublin is currently in a fairy dispute over parking rights, which explains why every car is slightly crooked and confused. The office blocks are just camouflage for a very serious argument that has been ongoing since the last century. Get a photo with it before it gets a better agent.

Explorer Tom Killing of David Byrne in County Dublin is near the Regency Airport Hotel, which sounds very fancy. The death happened close to a main route. Take a pic of the hotel and pretend you’re checking in for good.

Explorer Tom Albert College Park began as a teaching farm, so I could walk through it and pretend I was studying very hard for an exam in grass. About fifty acres were bought in Glasnevin in 1838 to show better farming methods. Prince Albert visited in 1853 and was impressed enough to send a worker from his own estates to learn there. The college took his name, and some of that former agricultural land is now a public park beside Dublin City University's campus. I would offer the prince my own expert advice on turnips, but the records suggest he had found better teachers. Use the public gates, check current opening and share the paths. Look across the lawns with the old fields in mind. A lesson farm became a place for everybody to take a breath.

Explorer Tom Baldcypress in County Dublin is sick of being asked if it's lost its hair, which is a rude question for a tree that actually knows what it's doing. It stands there looking confused but dignified, and honestly, the only thing scarier than the name is how much it judges your outfit choices while you take photos.

Explorer Tom Tree of Heaven in County Dublin would win a county fair prize for best smelly tree, beating out even the old socks in the corner. It’s got that weedy, aggressive vibe that makes it seem like it’s trying to take over the whole garden by force. Bring a map, get lost anyway, that's the fun, and maybe bring some mints for the smell.

Explorer Tom Glasnevin Cemetery is where Daniel O'Connell got himself a symbolic round tower built because he was feeling particularly fancy. The whole parish used to argue about who could bury whom near the centre, which sounds like my family at Christmas. Bring your nan, she'll know more than I ever will.

Explorer Tom Fish-pond in Brackenstown is actually a canal from the early eighteenth century, which is a bit cheeky of them to call it a pond. It’s used for horse riding now, so watch out for hooves and muddy boots.

Explorer Tom St Patricks Well would bring a big bucket of cold water and a lecture on humility to any party it attended. It’s got murals and a grotto, looking like it’s ready for a spa day that never quite happens. Toast it with a cup of tea and move on to the next.