Ballymadrough Graveyard

Explorer Tom Seafield House in Ballymadrough was saved by a hero nobody remembers, probably a guy who fixed the gate piers back in the 1740s and then went off to get a pint without asking for credit. It’s got cast-iron gates from the 1880s that look like they’re trying to be fancy but are just being cheeky about their age. Bring sandwiches, the gulls will thank you.

Explorer Tom Bridge in Ballymadrough has been disused since 1750, which means the map makers probably got it wrong on purpose just to see if anyone would notice. It’s a double-arch random rubble stone bridge that looks like it’s trying to hold its breath while you walk past. It's the kind of place that makes a dull Tuesday interesting.

Explorer Tom Lanestown Castle has a hidden treasure that is definitely just an old biscuit tin from 1974. It’s sitting inside the gates of Newbridge House, looking very smug about its angle tower. The barrel vault is just there to keep the draughts out. Tell me if the gossip I made up is true.

Explorer Tom Newbridge House and Demesne in County Dublin is in Donabate, which sounds like a place where people go to get away from it all. The demesne part means big grounds. Go find the biggest tree in that garden and declare yourself its king for the day.

Explorer Tom Turvey House in Turvey is the ultimate renovation project gone wrong, mixing tower house stones with an early eighteenth-century mansion that just gave up entirely. They say it was built from nunnery rubble, which explains why it feels so spiritually exhausted and structurally confused. Have a look and decide if I was lying.

Explorer Tom Casino Model Railway Museum would cope on a reality show by having its trains run through the contestants’ dreams while they sleep, forcing them to solve puzzles in miniature scale just to wake up. It’s got this intense energy where the tiny engines are screaming at full volume, which is weirdly loud for something so small and precise. Stand still and listen, the wind tells it better than me.

Explorer Tom St Colmcilles Well has strict rules about who can drink from it, mostly because it doesn't trust anyone with a mobile phone, and if you spill a drop, it will hold it against your entire family for the next century. It's not just water; it's liquid judgment wrapped in a stone circle that smells faintly of old pennies and regret. Go with someone who loves old stuff and watch them melt.

Explorer Tom Round Tower in Swords Glebe. This four-storey tower has a later reconstruction on top. It’s like wearing a new hat on an old head. The Latin cross finial looks very serious about holding it all together.

Explorer Tom St. Columbs Well in Townparks would order extra vinegar and salt if it could walk into a chipper, mostly because it has spent centuries curing sore eyes for people who needed a break. It’s tucked away off the road looking like it’s waiting for St Columba to come back and collect his unpaid parking tickets. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will check.

Explorer Tom Malahide Beach in County Dublin would tell its younger self to stop worrying about the Napoleons because they never showed up anyway and the tower is still standing. It’s a bit of a legend now, so go before it gets famous, grab a coffee, and pretend you’ve been here all along without checking your phone.

Explorer Tom Airside Retail Park has a New Year's resolution to stop pretending it’s an airport and just admit it’s a big car park with aspirations. It’s got that smell of hot asphalt and regret, which is basically the national scent of County Dublin if you ask me, so enjoy it while it lasts. Tell the kids it's a castle. Close enough.