Ahern's

Explorer Tom Post box in Kilgarvan is a 1930s cast-iron beauty with raised lettering that screams 'I am important'. It’s just standing on Midleton Street, waiting for letters that probably contain complaints about the weather. Tell it a joke, it's been a long time since anyone did.

Explorer Tom Park Villa in Ringmeen is a well-composed Victorian house on Laundry Hill with bay windows and an irregular roofline that screams drama. The porch displays high quality craftsmanship that makes it stand out from the rest of the pack. Watch out for the asymmetrical plan, it might trip you up!

Explorer Tom Sandymount House in Kilgarvan, County Cork is a symmetrical beauty from about 1820 that seems to be holding its breath. It has a doorcase made of silver-grey granite that looks expensive. Peek through the windows and see if anyone's still doing their paperwork!

Explorer Tom Saint Mary's National School is where they smuggled entire crates of whiskey through the veranda because the teachers were too busy counting windows to notice. Rumor has it the symmetrical bays were actually hiding spots for contraband, which explains the rhythmical fenestration. Wave to the ghosts if you dare.

Explorer Tom Cathedral View in Kilgarvan is built on a slope, so it’s probably always tilting to see what’s happening next door. It has an oriel window that looks like it’s peeking out shyly. Bring your worst luck, just in case the rain joins the party.

Explorer Tom Saint Colman's Cathedral in Cobh does something weird when nobody’s looking: it probably rearranges its own pews just to mess with anyone who tries to take a shortcut. It’s right by the harbour, so it looks majestic, but the acoustics are definitely playing tricks on you. Best visited with a curious kid and no timetable.

Explorer Tom Building the Titanic Memorial took roughly forty-seven cups of tea, or maybe fifty, I’m honestly not sure but the builders were definitely thirsty. It stands on the beach looking very serious about its own importance. If it rains, blame me.

Explorer Tom Cunard Líne Offices is judging your outfit because you didn’t bring a monocle or a very expensive hat. It’s where the fancy ships used to plan their routes across the big blue ocean to nowhere in particular. Visit, then text me what you think. I'll pretend to read it.

Explorer Tom John F. Kennedy Park would say in a job interview that it’s very flexible, multilingual, and great with children, even though it’s just a patch of grass. It prides itself on its international connections without actually having left the county once since 1963. Ring your granny and tell her where you are.

Explorer Tom Haulbowline in County Cork hosted a love story that ended with someone throwing a naval vessel at their ex-partner. It’s got military vibes but feels more like a messy breakup scene on a very large scale. Find the wonkiest bit and send it to your group chat.

Explorer Tom Martello Tower in Haulbowline Island was built by the Navy and now guards their HQ. It’s got wooden stairs and a water tank up top. Tell it I said g'day from across the harbour, will you?

Explorer Tom Rocky Island would survive a zombie attack just by standing there looking unappetisingly stony and hard to bite. Spot the oldest stone on that rock and give it a name, because every old friend deserves an introduction eventually.