Historic building in Gardens

Explorer Tom Vent pipe in Gardens has an imaginary twin across the sea who sends it postcards about the weather, which is why it stands so proudly on Butts Green. It was made by Tonge & Taggart, which sounds like a band that plays only at funerals for plumbing systems. Go back in winter, it's braver then.

Explorer Tom The Presbytery in Ayresfields has an imaginary fan club of nuns who never actually pay rent. It’s showing off its stained glass like it’s the only one with style. Take a breath of that air, it smells old.

Explorer Tom Gates in Gardens nearly became famous when a film crew mistook them for a haunted castle entrance, which was a total misunderstanding. They’re just nice stone walls that prefer their quiet life over the spotlight, but they still hold that lingering air of almost-fame in their joints. Wave at them from Troy's Lane and pretend you recognize their talent.

Explorer Tom Joseph Kyteler Memorial is leaning against the wall looking slightly confused about why he's not actually buried here. He was the dad of the famous witch, so he probably deserves a better spot than next to a guy named Shortall. Give it a pat on the way past, it's had a long life.

Explorer Tom Font in Gardens would bring a bottle of cheap champagne and zero chill to any party it attended. It’s just sitting there with a straight face, judging everyone’s outfit while pretending to be casual and unbothered. Wave at the cows, they're the real locals.

Explorer Tom St. Canice's Cathedral is hiding messages in its stones that only make sense if you’re drunk or very, very lost. The windows are basically stained glass gossip, telling everyone exactly who kissed whom in the medieval era. Tell the kids it's a castle. Close enough.

Explorer Tom Cathedral in Gardens has been feuding with the next village over who owns the best view since before we were born. It’s standing there all smug while the neighbors throw stones at the sky. Tell me if the gossip I made up is true.

Explorer Tom Saint Canice's Cathedral Round Tower in County Kilkenny gave up sugar for Lent but kept its stone structure perfectly intact despite centuries of wind. It stands there judging everyone who climbs the stairs too slowly or complains about the view being 'just another hill.' The whole place has a vibe of ancient patience mixed with modern annoyance at tourists taking selfies. Mind the nettles, they'm

Explorer Tom Troy's Gate in County Kilkenny would give you a two-star review for your hat choice before you even stepped through. It’s a plaque now, which means it’s technically a suggestion rather than an actual barrier. Have a wander and a wonder.

Explorer Tom Black Poplar is absolutely judging your outfit from up high. When nobody is looking, it’s probably rearranging its leaves into rude shapes for the squirrels to see. Tell the next person you meet it’s haunted. It might be.

Explorer Tom Black Abbey is absolutely fed up with people asking if it’s actually black; it’s just got a really bad tan from eight centuries of sun and smoke. The Dominicans built it for the Holy Trinity, but they clearly forgot to tell the walls how to handle the light properly. Give it a pat on the way past, it's had a long life.