Tourism info

Explorer Tom Tower Museum is reviewing its visitors from the top down, probably giving them two stars out of five. It likes people who stand still and look confused by the old coins on display. Ideal place to rehearse an excuse for being late.

Explorer Tom O'Doherty's Castle is also known as The Magazine, which sounds like a place for old ladies to gossip about seeds. Bring a notebook and write the bit I made up, because I’m definitely making it up.

Explorer Tom Danske Bank in Derry is where your money goes to die a quiet death. Built in the 1860s, it’s basically a fancy box for your hard-earned cash. Bring a map, get lost anyway, that’s the whole bloody point.

Explorer Tom Post Office in Derry refuses to fall down because it’s too stubborn to admit it’s old. It’s been delivering mail and disappointment since the 1860s without missing a beat. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will actually check your ID.

Explorer Tom Peace Flame in County Derry is like the uncle at the wedding who stands in the corner looking slightly too intense. It’s been burning since 2013 and still hasn’t quite figured out what its main job is beyond looking pretty. I think it’s just trying very hard to be meaningful without actually saying anything specific. Go back in winter, it's a different animal.

Explorer Tom This other Millennium Milepost smells like rust and regret, according to Tom, who isn't entirely wrong. It stands by the River Foyle, looking very important for no reason at all. Leave nothing but footprints and a bad pun.

Explorer Tom I'll walk Derry's walls with you, and keep my siege jokes in my pocket. Derry's walls make a full circuit of the old city, a stone ring built between 1613 and 1619 under the eye of builder Peter Benson. They were intended to protect settlers after the earlier town had been destroyed, so this was serious defensive work, not a scenic footpath with cannons added for character. In 1688 thirteen apprentices shut the gates against an approaching force; the following year's siege lasted until supply ships broke through a boom on the Foyle. The walls were never breached, hence the city's nickname, the Maiden City. The view reaches beyond the stones; I will take it in without pretending those centuries were easy. St Columb's Cathedral and other landmarks sit inside the circuit, giving you plenty to inspect as you walk. Public access to the wall walk may vary with maintenance or events, so check locally before counting on a full lap. Look over both the old city and the surrounding streets; this wall has held a lot more than stone.

Explorer Tom The Siege of Derry involved thirteen apprentice boys locking gates against King James, which is basically the ultimate door slam. A local claims to have invented the whole siege himself, bless him. Have a look and decide if I was lying.

Explorer Tom Diamond War Memorial: This place would bring a tiny top hat and a very serious face to any party. It’s got that 'I survived both World Wars and still look sharp' energy going on. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom Derry Girls Mural in County Derry refuses to fall down because it knows exactly how much drama it generates if it does. It’s got a thick coat of paint and an even thicker attitude towards the weather. Stand where the owner stood and practise looking smug.

Explorer Tom Bloodly Sunday Memorial witnessed a pigeon fly directly into the memorial plaque last Tuesday, which was either divine intervention or just really bad luck for the bird in question. It’s got heavy significance but also a surprisingly good view of the street traffic below when the crowds thin out. Tell me if the gossip I made up is true.

Explorer Tom The Apprentice Boys Museum has a family tree that is mostly made up of cousins who argued about the door handles. They shut the gates in 1689 and haven't opened them properly since. Bring a flask and pretend you own the place.