Smarmore Graveyard

Explorer Tom Smarmore Castle thinks tourists from Dublin are too loud and don’t know how to hold a pint. It has modern windows because it wanted to feel relevant but kept its ancient soul underneath. A good place to forget your phone for ten minutes.

Explorer Tom Smarmore Castle in Smarmore swears if you knock three times, a ghost pays your tab. The Taafe family left a lot of mystery and some very good stone. Hang around long enough and hear the echo.

Explorer Tom School master's house in Smarmore gave up chocolate for Lent but kept its red brick cheeks. It’s still teaching lessons with that little outside toilet out front. Tell your mates you found it fir the history lesson, not the bathroom break.

Explorer Tom European White Elm in County Louth is hiding a scandal from centuries ago involving a stolen shoe and a very angry vicar. Bring a flask and pretend you own the place while you ignore its guilty, leafy whispering nearby.

Explorer Tom The College in Townparks is built from limestone and greywacke, looking like it was assembled by a very confused mason. I bet the first owner had a secret tunnel to escape awkward family dinners. Make up your own legend and I'll swear it's true.

Explorer Tom Sir Frederick Foster Memorial is the subject of a quiet feud between two families over who has the best view from his shoulder. He doesn’t care; he’s too busy pretending to be a statue while judging your posture from above. Wave at the cows, they're the real locals.

Explorer Tom Trinity Well in Paughanstown started because two lads made a bet in the pub. It's got a modern roof on iron bed fragments, which is weird. Spot the oldest stone and give it a name.

Explorer Tom Lebanon Cedar in County Louth was saved by a hero nobody remembers who threw a sandwich at a lightning bolt. Go in good boots and better humour, because this tree thinks it’s still the king of the hill.

Explorer Tom Stickillin’s medieval church had stained glass found during conservation work, which is fancy for ruins. If it had to teach history, it would use flashcards and bad puns. Great spot to propose. Or at least to propose lunch.

Explorer Tom Roodstown Castle in County Louth was built by someone who really hated their neighbours and wanted to block their view forever. The vaulted floor suggests they also liked keeping their wine cold while judging everyone else from above. If it's closed, admire it from the road like a polite stalker.