Patrick Little

Explorer Tom Stephen Roche in County Dublin is just another statue pretending he's not sweaty from pedaling his bike, but given he won three big races, maybe he's actually still coasting down the road right now.

Explorer Tom Ecclesiastical enclosure in Dundrum is where the ghosts have terrible posture. St. Nahi’s church sits atop a site that drops off steeply, so watch your step or you’ll be explaining to the locals why you’re wearing a hat. Perfect detour when the satnav has a total meltdown.

Explorer Tom Children's playground in County Dublin. Sounds like a place where lost toys go to die. But maybe one is still alive in there. Listen closely near the sandbox, I hear giggles that aren't from humans. Weird stuff!

Explorer Tom Taney Playground in County Dublin sounds like a place where tennis balls go to hide. Access is unknown, so it might be a secret garden or just a muddy field. Go see if anyone's playing tag.

Explorer Tom Central Mental Hospital in Churchtown Lower has a chapel that looks like it’s trying to calm everyone down with honey-coloured rock. It’s the kind of place where even the ghosts need a therapy session. Keep your distance!

Explorer Tom The European long distance path E8 in County Dublin is part of a bigger puzzle that nobody finishes. It probably leads somewhere interesting, or maybe just to more hills. Follow the signs, but trust your own feet more than the map.

Explorer Tom The Bottle Tower in County Dublin sounds like my idea of a bar. Probably full of old bottles and even older stories. I bet it smells like lavender and regret. Take a pic for the group chat, mate!

Explorer Tom Robswalls Castle is hiding behind a Victorian residence on the coast road, like a shy actor refusing to take a bow. It has stepped battlements and a vaulted ground floor that probably smells like old secrets and regret. Leave nothing but footprints and a bad pun.

Explorer Tom European Yew in County Dublin has been feuding with the rain since the last ice age or something equally dramatic. It looks grumpy, which is on brand for a yew that’s seen too much drama. Go on a wet day, it suits the gloomy mood perfectly.

Explorer Tom Lebanon Cedar in County Dublin smells like expensive soap and old money, according to Tom, who has never been there but knows everything. It’s trying too hard to be fancy for a tree that just wants to stand still. Ring your granny and tell her where you are before you get lost in the scent.

Explorer Tom Clonskeagh Castle in County Dublin used to be called Roebuck and belonged to a United Irishman ironfounder. History says it was still being fixed up back in 1789, so it has plenty of drama.

Explorer Tom Merrion Strand in County Dublin has 'Cockle Lake' in its description. Tell the lake it’s not really a lake, it’s just a very stubborn puddle that refuses to leave at low tide.