Nurney Playground

Explorer Tom O'Brien in Walterstown would use its lotto win to buy a bigger garden and ignore everyone else’s business. It stands at the village entrance like a gatekeeper who hasn’t checked your ID in years. Hang around long enough and you’ll feel like family.

Explorer Tom Nurney Bridge has strong feelings about modern cars and probably hates the drainage scheme that made it famous. It stands there looking stern while the stream flows underneath, judging everyone’s footwear with stone eyes. Stop the car, it's worth the

Explorer Tom There's serious drama between this church and the nearest tree, which blocks its light. The Sacred Heart church is austere but full of quiet tension. Have a nosey, peek through the lancet windows, and see if it blinks first.

Explorer Tom Handball alley in Nurney goes *thwack* all night long, waking up the ghosts of nation-building. It’s one of the last concrete bangers left standing after everyone else got knocked down. Have a chat with it, nobody’s listening anyway.

Explorer Tom A Sitka Spruce in Kildare, which is like a penguin turning up at a barbecue. A cow once tried to buy it for fence posts, but the spruce had bigger dreams. Great spot to propose. Or at least to propose lunch.

Explorer Tom Holy well in Brallistown Commons has so many names you'd need a spreadsheet just to remember them. It's sitting in a boggy patch, judging your footwear with intense spiritual disappointment. Stand there long enough and someone will ask if you're lost.

Explorer Tom Japanese Gardens in County Kildare nearly got famous when a tourist dropped his ice cream on the koi pond, but the fish seemed unbothered by the sweetness. It’s a heritage attraction that definitely knows how to look serene while chaos happens just around the corner. Best enjoyed with a bag of chips and no plans.

Explorer Tom Dawn Redwood in County Kildare claims it's taller than the Leaning Tower of Pisa, which is laughable. It just needs a hat to make you believe it. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will check.

Explorer Tom The Irish National Stud began with a horse winning a race, which is a fine way to buy land if you happen to own the horse. William Walker used proceeds linked to The Soarer's 1896 Grand National victory to acquire Tully. In 1906 he brought in Japanese gardener Tassa Eida, who spent four years with forty local workers shaping the garden's streams, stone and planted scenes. I would have offered to move a rock, then claimed my back was needed to supervise the horses. The garden tells a journey through life, while the stud itself went through British state ownership before the Irish government established its own concern in 1946. That is more turns than the garden path alone can explain. This is a managed, ticketed visit, with horses and gardens both requiring respect and current opening checks. Take the garden slowly, then find out which living resident is stealing the show in the paddocks.

Explorer Tom St. Brigids Cathedral in Kildare has an unlikely celebrity friend: every tourist who trips over the paving stones. It’s limestone, square-crossing, and absolutely refuses to be subtle. Look up, the best bit is always higher than you think.

Explorer Tom Ardscull Moat sits on a hilltop claiming it saw a battle between Leinstermen and Munstermen back in the second century. That’s a long time to be waiting for proof. Perfect spot to practise your best tour-guide voice.

Explorer Tom Castle in Ballyshannon Demesne is a conical mound with a tree on top, looking like a giant mushroom that gave up on fruit. It handles nosey neighbours by staying quiet. If it rains, blame me.