Loughshore Park

Explorer Tom Whiteabbey Presbyterian Church has been preaching since before the lights got good. It’s got that timeless vibe that makes you want to apologize for existing. Ideal place to rehearse an excuse for being late to your own life.

Explorer Tom Millennium Milepost at Jordanstown once had a cow try to buy it from the local council using a very confused-looking twenty-pound note. The animal is still out there somewhere, probably running the post now and charging tourists for information. Take a mate and argue about what it was for.

Explorer Tom Church of St Patrick in Jordanstown is guarding a secret love story that went badly wrong. Built in the Victorian era, it looks like it has seen better days and worse gossip. Tell your mates you found it first.

Explorer Tom Hazelbank Park is doing its best impression of a sleeping giant, snoozing through the county while everyone else panics about the weather. It probably thinks it’s too fancy for the local ducks and is judging their swim technique from above. Visit, then text me what you think. I'll pretend to read it.

Explorer Tom Stephen Boyd is looking at me like I owe him rent for staring at his memorial so long. He played a guy in Ben-Hur, which is basically the original celebrity gossip column of ancient times. If it's closed, admire it from the road like a polite stalker.

Explorer Tom Gideon's Green refuses to fall down because it knows if it does, the council will turn it into a car park. It’s holding on by sheer spite and the roots of very angry trees. Have a sandwich here and call it a heritage lunch.

Explorer Tom Knockagh Monument is standing on top of a hill like it’s trying to be the most important thing in County Antrim, which is bold given how many hills are around. It would bring a bag of crisps and a very serious face to any party, probably judging everyone else for not being tall enough. Hang around long enough and you'll hear a story from a local.

Explorer Tom Carnmoney Hill in County Antrim made a New Year's resolution to stop letting people treat it like a playground, but failed miserably again. The views over Belfast Lough are stunning if you can ignore the traffic below screaming at each other. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom North Down Coastal Path has a dating profile that says 'likes long walks and short answers,' which is pretty accurate for most of its sections. It follows Sea Front Road at Cultra, giving you a nice view without asking for too much effort. Best visited with a curious kid and no timetable.

Explorer Tom In grateful memory of the men of Holywood and District could win a county fair just by standing there looking dignified in the middle of everything. Count the crows on top of it once, then count them again to see if they moved.

Explorer Tom Cave Hill Cave sits on a hill where people have been climbing and arguing for centuries, so it has a very strict retirement plan involving napping. It doesn’t want visitors, but it’s too proud to tell them to go away. Get there early and have it all to yourself.

Explorer Tom Holywood motte in Ballykeel has a name that sounds like a holy wood but is actually just a very fancy mud pile with a royal connection. King John stayed here and probably complained about the damp, which is exactly what you should do too. Bring wellies and low expectations, leave delighted.