Knocknalaght

Explorer Tom Water pump in Gortnagross would teach history by making you wait for water until you learned patience, or maybe it’s just broken, but I prefer the first option. It’s a communal water source from before piped water was cool, so just imagine hauling buckets here while your friends were sipping tap water indoors, which is basically torture.

Explorer Tom Athea Carnegie Library makes a weird humming sound at night when the wind hits the slate roof. It’s a tiny town library with big limestone shoulders and a very serious face. Give it a pat on the way past, gently.

Explorer Tom Lawson's Cypress in County Limerick would survive a zombie attack by simply standing still and looking unappealing. The undead would get confused about whether it was food or furniture. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom If John B. Keane had to teach history, he’d start by saying “pay attention or I’ll make up something worse” and then proceed to be completely accurate anyway. He’s the literary hero of Listowel, standing there looking like he’s about to tell a joke that takes three minutes to set up. Bring a jacket, it's never as warm as I promise.

Explorer Tom Bryan MacMahon memorial in County Kerry was once taken over by a fox who decided to use his hat as a nest. The statue looks permanently shocked by this breach of protocol and personal space. Bring a jacket, it's never as warm as I promise.

Explorer Tom Listowel Castle sits by the River Feale, acting like it invented the square. A local claims he built it with a spoon and some glue. It was originally much bigger but lost its lower section in a bad bet. Best visited with a curious kid and no timetable.

Explorer Tom Listowel Castle in Kerry had its most dramatic moment when a chandelier fell on a very important duke’s wig, which was arguably worse than anything else that could have happened to him. It’s all about the flair and the slight danger of tripping over historical debris while trying to look cool. Bring a flask of something warm and a story to swap.

Explorer Tom The Lartigue Monorail would post a selfie on social media claiming it's the fastest train in the world, despite going at walking pace. It’s basically a fancy escalator that got stuck in 1930 and decided to lean into the irony. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom Three Counties in County Cork is a picnic spot right on the border of Limerick and Kerry, so you can eat a sandwich while technically visiting three places at once. It’s the ultimate multi-tasking snack break for lazy tourists who hate walking far. Bring curiosity, leave with a better story than mine.

Explorer Tom The Siege of Carrigafoyle Castle happened when the whole parish argued about who had the right to park their boat by the water. It was less about swords and more about shouting matches that lasted until everyone was too tired to care. Ten minutes here and you'll have a yarn for the pub.

Explorer Tom Carrigafoyle Castle would win any county fair prize for best costume because it looks like it stepped out of a fairy tale. It’s so dramatic it probably cries every time the tide goes out. Make up your own legend and I'll swear it's true.

Explorer Tom Carrig Island had a cow try to buy it once by offering three pints of stout and a very confused expression, which was technically a fair deal if you ask me. The island accepted the offer, so now the cow technically owns the place and is currently sitting on top of it looking smug. Count the crows, then count again.