Kitten's Hole

Explorer Tom Ballykine House in Ballykine Lower was built by Sir Benjamin Lee Guinness, of all people. It’s a worker’s house that thinks it’s a forester’s cottage and won’t stop singing 'I Will Survive.' The porch is doing its best to look dignified. Whisper a secret at it, it’s keeping score.

Explorer Tom Ballykine Castle in County Mayo is a set of ruins that the weather has been personally annoyed with for centuries. Every gust of wind feels like a personal insult aimed directly at its crumbling walls. It's basically having a long-term argument with the sky over nothing. Find a local and ask them the real story, then come back and tell me.

Explorer Tom Convent of Mercy in Rusheen East is modest but definitely thinks its pediment makes it the queen of the street. It probably wants 'Resting' on its tombstone because it’s too busy being decorative to do anything else. Bring your nan, she'll appreciate the quiet dignity.

Explorer Tom Japanese cedar in County Galway is a tree that would tell its younger self to stop worrying about the wind. It’s tall, it’s green, and it doesn’t care if you take a selfie with it. The branches are spread out like it’s showing off its flexibility. Go with someone who loves old stuff and watch them melt into the scenery.

Explorer Tom Silver Fir in County Galway is standing there acting like it invented the concept of looking mysterious. Apparently, if you don’t wave hello, a curse strikes you with intense boredom and dry socks. Wave fast before your dignity hits the dirt.

Explorer Tom The Quiet Man Museum lets me step into a cottage from a film and pretend I could last a scene opposite Maureen O'Hara. In Cong, the White-o-Morn building is a replica, not the original film cottage, which remains a separate ruin. Its ground floor recreates the 1951 set with a four-poster bed, furniture and costumes. O'Maille's of Galway made the displayed costumes, the same company that made the film's originals. Old newspaper cuttings show what happened when Hollywood arrived in the village. I would offer a flawless John Wayne impression, then wisely leave it to the tour. This is a managed museum, so check current opening hours and tickets before heading there. Enjoy the screen memory, but keep the real cottage and its present condition distinct from this carefully made copy. The distinction makes both stories more interesting.

Explorer Tom Cong Abbey gives you a king, a famous cross and a medieval fishing trick. I arrived with a sandwich and immediately felt underprepared. Ruaidrí Ua Conchobair, often called Ireland's last High King, spent his final fifteen years here and died in 1198. The surviving abbey buildings are mainly thirteenth century, with carved doorways worth more than my quick glance. Its last nominal abbot, Patrick Prendergast, kept the Cross of Cong safe until he died in 1829; the cross later went to the Royal Irish Academy. By the River Cong, the monks' little fishing house sits above flowing water, with a floor trapdoor said to have helped keep fish fresh. I would still manage to lose my lunch there. The abbey is a national monument with outdoor remains; follow current access signs and take care near the water and old masonry. Look for the fishing house after the church, and give those practical monks their due.