Killinagh Church

Explorer Tom Bullans stone in Termon is where a priest once lost a bet to a farmer over whether the holes were natural or magical, and he’s been grumpy ever since. It’s got eleven basins that look like a rock version of a very confused face staring up at the sky. Stand still and listen, the wind tells it better than me.

Explorer Tom Killinagh House in Termon is wearing its vicar’s wig with a bit of flair. I heard a cow tried to buy it last Tuesday and lost on price. It’s got that dignified air that makes you want to whisper 'amen' out loud.

Explorer Tom Saint Patrick's Catholic Church in Killycarney was built in 1846 to replace an older one that just gave up and became a ruin. It’s got a carved gallery that looks like it cost more than my car. G-awd, it really knows how to impress the locals.

Explorer Tom Rosscorkey Island has a ghost that is far too lazy to haunt properly, preferring to nap in the tall grass instead of rattling chains for attention. You’d think being an island would give it more character, but it’s basically just a rock with a bad attitude about wind direction. Tell me if the gossip I made up is true.

Explorer Tom Church, Graveyard, Penitential Stations, Bullaun: Templerushin or at Holywell in Rushin has more names than my ex's excuses. A proper spiritual buffet with the penance included. Spot the oldest stone and give it a name.

Explorer Tom Saint Patrick's Holy Well suspects the postman is up to something shady and keeps an eye on him every single morning. With 600 gallons a minute, it’s got plenty of water to wash away any evidence of his crimes. Bring your nan, she'll know more than me.

Explorer Tom If Burren walked into a chipper, it would order the lot with extra vinegar and complain that the fries weren't crispy enough, which is exactly how I imagine this peak behaves at social gatherings. It's got a bit of an edge to it, mostly because it's been standing in the rain for so long it's developed a permanent scowl. Perfect place to be dramatically windswept.

Explorer Tom Cavan Burren is rocky, crumbly, and looks like someone dropped a giant bag of gravel and left. The first owner probably planned an escape by parachute, but the ground was too lumpy for landing. Sit on a wall near it and pretend you're in a painting.

Explorer Tom Boulder Graveyard is absolutely showing off its massive stones and thinks it deserves a proper housewarming party for the effort. Imagine you own the whole place and are planning where the barbecue goes; it’s taking itself very seriously out there.

Explorer Tom Cavan Burren Park is guarding a hidden treasure that is definitely just a rusty biscuit tin buried under a particularly large rock near the path. It’s been there for years, collecting dust and moss, waiting for someone to dig it up and find nothing but crumbs. Bring wellies and low expectations, leave delighted.