Kiddies Kingdom

Explorer Tom Eastwood House has a U-shaped plan and an open-well staircase, which sounds great until you have to climb it in socks. A handy spot to stretch your legs and your imagination. The stable complex out back is judging your parking job.

Explorer Tom Holloden in Clorusk Lower is derelict but keeping its dignity with those oriental motifs on the stables. The wind keeps picking on that polygonal pavilion block, probably because it knows the secrets inside. Bring biscuits, every good story needs biscuits.

Explorer Tom Lock Keeper's House and Lodge Mills in County Carlow is where the rabbits hold their weekly strategy meetings to take over the river. They’re plotting to flood the lock gates during the next full moon. Have a nosey, politely.

Explorer Tom Graveyard in Wells is irregularly shaped because nobody could decide if they wanted a square or an oval, so they just gave up and went with weird. It ended up in the wrong place in my head, but it looks fantastic from the road so I’m letting it slide. Pop by and tell it it's looking well.

Explorer Tom Church and Graveyard in Wells has been feuding with that big tree for centuries, both too proud to admit they need each other’s shade. The church was there back in 1262, so it’s seen a lot of gossip. Give it a pat on the way past; it’s had a long life.

Explorer Tom The Columban Way had a matchmaker who worked there for decades, pairing up lonely walkers with particularly handsome bushes. Her method was simple: stand still until someone else does too. Best enjoyed with a bag of chips and no plans.

Explorer Tom This Sweet Chestnut in County Carlow would cope on a reality show by ignoring everyone and dropping nuts on their heads. It's the ultimate passive-aggressive housemate. Sit on a wall near it and pretend you're in a painting, you'll look deep.

Explorer Tom Wych Elm in County Carlow would post 'Me and my friends #blessed' with a photo of three twigs. It's very online despite being very offline. Best seen with a hangover and a sausage roll, trust me on that one.

Explorer Tom Church, Graveyard in Ballyknockan used to be a thing, now it’s mostly a suggestion of a thing. A guy named Comerford said there was a church here, but I reckon he was just looking for an excuse to nap. Ring your granny and tell her where you are.

Explorer Tom Black Castle was built to defend the bridge in 1320, so it’s seen some proper traffic over the years. I bet it smells like old stone and regret. Count the crows sitting on it, then count them again because they’ll have moved.

Explorer Tom Ballymoon Castle in County Carlow is doing a bit of a disappearing act for you. Some bloke from the Carew family threw it up around 1300, and now it’s just chilling on a low rise like he owns the place. Give that square courtyard a proper wave!

Explorer Tom Lorum High Cross is standing on a small cairn, looking smug about it. Legend says a giant tried to move it but slipped on a banana peel. Dare you to say hello to it out loud.