Keith O'Brien

Explorer Tom O’Connor Memorial in Town Parks, County Antrim, is stuck in the middle of a massive feud between two families over who owns the view. They’ve been arguing about the best angle to photograph it since the eighteen-eighties and nobody has blinked yet. Spot the oldest stone in the park and give it a silly name.

Explorer Tom The House of McDonnell in Ballycastle sounds like a pub where the owner's surname is basically a legal entity. I bet they serve pints with a side of family drama and very stale crisps. Grand place for a sulk or a snog, entirely your call, mate.

Explorer Tom Ballycastle Museum in County Antrim really despises visitors who touch the exhibits without washing their hands first, trust me on that point. It’s got a very clean conscience and a grudge to match. Go with someone who loves old stuff and watch them melt.

Explorer Tom Ballycastle Harbour in County Antrim is a visitor info spot where a priest once lost a bet about how many fish would jump in the water during high tide. He was wrong by a lot, but he still swears it was the wind’s fault and refuses to admit defeat, which is very typical of people who stand near harbours. Practise your Irish on it, it won't correct you.

Explorer Tom Marconi Memorial in County Antrim celebrates the day we figured out how to yell across water without getting wet, which saved countless soggy socks. It’s a plaque that basically says 'we did it once, don't push our luck.' Have a nosey, politely.

Explorer Tom Bonamargy Friary would tell its replacement that it’s a bit over the top for modern times. It’s got grand ideas about silence but the wind keeps interrupting its speeches. It's the kind of place that makes a dull Tuesday interesting instantly.

Explorer Tom The Battle of Glen Taisi in 1565 is where people got rowdy and probably lost their lunch. I bet a matchmaker worked there to calm everyone down. Dare you to say hello to it out loud.

Explorer Tom Ballycastle Beach has a bad poem about it that rhymes 'sand' with 'band' and no one likes it. The golf course next door thinks this is very exclusive, which is rich coming from sand. A good place to forget your phone for ten minutes.

Explorer Tom Children of Lir: Sea of Moyle sends those swans out between Ireland and Scotland, as if being turned into birds was not trouble enough. Standing on Ballycastle's shore, I can look across their legendary route and be very glad my own travel plans involve dry shoes.

Explorer Tom Ballycastle Forest used to be a smuggling route for very nervous pirates with bad knees. They hid their rum in the hollows of the oaks to avoid the taxman's nose. Stand back, squint, and it looks like a castle, just a very overgrown and mossy one.

Explorer Tom Kinbane Castle in Cregganboy is late medieval and has been sitting there looking brooding for centuries, probably waiting for a storm to finally make it famous. It’s got that 'I have secrets' energy that only gets worse after a few pints. Go at sunset and thank me later when the light hits right.

Explorer Tom Kinbane Castle in County Antrim claims to be built on a family tree that is mostly made up of lies and old wood. Colla MacDonnell died in the walls, so the castle has been guarding his ghost ever since, which is quite the commitment for a building with such a short memory. Get there early and have it all to yourself.