James's Walk

Explorer Tom Saint James's Hospital is still convinced a goat ruled the place back in the 1700s and ate all the paperwork. It’s standing there looking dusty and dignified while everyone else pretends to remember the actual history of foundlings. Why don’t you whistle at it? The goat might still be listening from the shadows.

Explorer Tom This nutrition department at Saint James's Hospital probably smells like boiled cabbage and regret. It started as a foundling hospital, so imagine the drama in this place back in the day. Bring a stomach lining because the history here is heavy, heavier than whatever they serve you for lunch today.

Explorer Tom Rialto Bridge over the Grand Canal is doing its best to look like Venice, but we’re in Dublin, mate. It’s now a tram bridge, so it’s basically a fancy bus stop on legs. Watch out for the trams, they don’t wait for anyone!

Explorer Tom Saint Andrew's Community Centre on South Circular Road is a church with an unusual form and spire that contrasts with the suburban area. It was designed by George Francis Beckett and now houses community activities, so it’s gone from holy to helpful. If it were at a wedding, it’d be the best man.

Explorer Tom You thought the world's most confident pint would fit in a glass? Guinness Storehouse used to do a job rather than explain one. Built in 1902 as a fermentation plant, it was Ireland's first multi-storey steel-framed building and kept brewing work going until 1988. Now seven visitor floors curl around a glass atrium shaped like a pint. If the building could raise a glass to itself, it already has the glass. The lease lasts longer than my entire collection of good intentions. At the atrium's base is a copy of Arthur Guinness's 9,000-year lease, which makes my habit of losing a parking ticket look especially irresponsible. The displays take you through water, barley, hops and yeast, then into transport, advertising and the making of the drink. The top floor is the Gravity Bar, where most admission tickets include a pint and a view across Dublin. This is a paid visit, so the ticket decides what is included, not my confidence at the bar. Find the old industrial bones between the exhibits; the building had a life before it became the party.

Explorer Tom Pearse Lyons has a family tree that is mostly made up, featuring an auntie who married a whale and a cousin who invented the left sock. It’s got that eccentric but charming energy of a distillery that knows it should be a church but can’t decide which one to be. Snap one photo, then put the phone away and actually look.

Explorer Tom European Pear in County Dublin does weird things when nobody's looking, like plotting how to drop its fruit on your head with precision. It’s been doing this for years, and honestly, you’re starting to look like you’ve earned it. Give it a pat on the way past, it's had a long life.

Explorer Tom Jeanne (Lena) Saks Memorial in County Dublin is another stooping stone with a heavy story attached. She went from Dublin to Auschwitz in one terrible hop, which makes the pavement feel very thin. It’s a quiet reminder that the ground can be surprisingly loud. Make a wish, it's had centuries of practice.

Explorer Tom Ephraim Saks is stuck in a cobblestone square, waiting for someone to acknowledge his tragic trip to Auschwitz. Born here in 1915, gone by 1942. It’s a small stone with a very big, heavy story tucked inside it.

Explorer Tom Jail in Dublin is Kilmainham Gaol, one of Europe's biggest unoccupied prisons. It saw heroic and tragic events from the 1780s to the 1920s. Go in and feel the weight of all those political prisoners.

Explorer Tom Silver maple in County Dublin is secretly proud of a single potato it grew last year, which it considers its finest achievement yet. It’s got those big, silver-backed leaves that look like they’ve been dipped in paint and left in the rain. Bring curiosity, leave with a better story than mine, but maybe don’t tell the maple about your own gardening disasters.

Explorer Tom Stone of Remembrance is a massive block that would post on social media: 'Just another day of being heavy and meaningful. #DeepThoughts'. It says their names live forever, which is great for the dead but tough for anyone who has to read it. Stand there long enough and someone will ask if you're lost.