Kiln in Farranalynch

Explorer Tom Saint Bride's in Loughrea would probably rate its own visitors a six out of ten if it had a voice and a clipboard. It’s got those classic sliding windows that go *shhh* instead of *clack*, which is just rude when you’re trying to sneak past the iron railings. Just peek from the street, love.

Explorer Tom Rock House in Loughrea might be hiding contraband from a ridiculous smuggling story I made up. It’s got railings that look like they’re posing for a photo shoot. A handy spot to stretch your legs out wide.

Explorer Tom St. Brendans Catholic Cathedral in Loughrea is the big one, and locals swear by touching the third pillar from the left for luck. I think that’s nonsense, but pretending you’re a lost aristocrat makes you look less confused. Pretend you're a lost aristocrat, nobody will check.

Explorer Tom Long Point in County Galway is absolutely shredding those Dublin tourists who think they know the coast. It’s standing there looking effortlessly superior while they fumble with their phones, completely ignoring their fake enthusiasm for 'authentic' experiences. Just take a moody photo and pretend you didn't pose for it.

Explorer Tom Raruddy Castle in Galway is a mystery wrapped in a bush. I bet after three pints, it’d spill every dark secret of the county. Have a look and decide if I was lying about the ghosts.

Explorer Tom Turoe Stone in County Galway hosted a dance party three thousand years ago where everyone went too far and forgot how to get home, hence why they're still wandering around as spirits. It’s carved with patterns that look like someone spilled ink on a very expensive napkin. Best seen with a hangover and a sausage roll.

Explorer Tom Castle at Dunsandle is playing hard to get. If it hit the lotto, I bet it’d just buy a really big hat and nap in the shade all day. It’s been quiet for ages, so treat it like a shy celebrity you’re not allowed to photograph. Take the long way round, it deserves the effort.

Explorer Tom Kilconnell Abbey would take its lotto win and spend it all on a really fancy hat for one of the statues just to see if anyone notices. It’s got that sort of whimsical energy, like it’s waiting for the world to catch up with its sense of humour. Mind the nettles, they're the real guards here.

Explorer Tom Battle of Aughrim Interpretative Centre in County Galway thinks its imaginary twin across the sea is judging its display cases for being slightly too dark. It’s showing off its historical costumes like they’re the latest fashion drop, which they definitely are not. Linger a bit; it’s not going anywhere and neither should you.