Illaunybaun

Explorer Tom Lismore in Carrowcore in County Clare was prophesied to become a gold mine but instead just became a very damp circle of dirt that nobody wants to touch or claim ownership of anymore. It’s sitting there waiting for destiny to show up, but it’s been waiting so long it has started taking naps under the grassy sky. Have a wander and a wonder.

Explorer Tom Townlough Castle in County Tipperary was invented by a local who just really wanted a good story to tell at the pub. He probably pointed at some rocks and said, 'That’s where my castle is,' and everyone believed him out of politeness. It’s a bit of a mystery, so go before the tourists find out it’s all made up.

Explorer Tom Aughinish Wood is a forest that complains to the council about every single leaf it loses, filing formal grievances with the wind for being too aggressive. It sits near an island, so it probably thinks it’s actually part of the sea and gets offended when people call it land. Best visited with a curious child who doesn't have a timetable or any idea where they are going.

Explorer Tom Millenium Cross Heritage Attraction in County Tipperary would cope with a reality show by standing completely still while everyone else argues about the food. It’s a cross that marked the new millennium, so it has seen every bad haircut trend since then without blinking. Ideal spot for a dramatic phone call.

Explorer Tom Derry Castle deals with nosey neighbours by simply not having a roof, so they can’t peek in from above easily. It’s a brilliant strategy that saves on heating bills and privacy concerns simultaneously. Ten minutes here and you'll have a yarn for the pub.

Explorer Tom Scilly Island’s least favourite visitor is definitely the guy who tried to buy it with a voucher for a day at the spa and a large hamper. He showed up in a tuxedo and asked where the valet parking was, which confused everyone present including the local wildlife significantly. Best enjoyed with a bag of chips and no plans.